More Precious than Jewels

Jumping into January

2012-02-05T19:08:00.000-08:00

Yes Lord, I know all that I need I will find at your feet …..

The Lord blessed me with the opportunity to see or hear from many of you over my way too short Christmas break, which filled my heart to overflowing…it was amazing stepping back into your lives and witnessing the faithfulness of God and watching Him work in a million different ways. I shared stories of the same in my life and soaked up the fellowship and joy that came with being reunited. I am just amazed at the people God has placed in my life. I love each and every one of you and THANK YOU for partnering with me for the gospel of Christ.

I’ve prayed long and hard about this update and hope that as you take time to read it, the Spirit of the living God will connect with you and encourage, challenge, and bring refreshment through what I have to share.

I’ve been meditating the past couple weeks on Isaiah 26 and wanted to share some key verses first off:

The path of the righteous is level; O upright One, you make the way of the righteous smooth. Yes, LORD, walking in the way of your laws, we wait for you; your name and renown are the desire of our hearts. My soul yearns for you in the night; in the morning my spirit longs for you. When your judgments come upon the earth, the people of the world learn righteousness. You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock eternal.

Well, when I got back to Tegucigalpa after Christmas I was hit hard with culture shock and a hard dose of reality. I traveled overnight and school started bright and early the next morning a little before 7am and it was my turn to give staff devotions. The kids were not ready to be back in school, let alone the teachers, and it felt like a downhill landslide after that. I was observed by my principle that week after returning and felt stressed just getting back into the groove of life. I hadn’t expected to feel the attack, depression, and lack of motivation especially after being excited to come back, but the wet blanket settled over me, leaving me no choice but to accept the reality of life when transitions across cultures and worlds happen. Instead of getting frustrated I tried to take it as it came.

In all reality, God was asking me to put into practice the simple truth He’s been pounding into my heart and head this whole past semester….thankfulness.

As I began to turn my bad attitude and heavy heart to hum a tune of grateful praise I realized the amazing transformation that occurs when our mouths are overflowing with thankfulness and our hearts are constantly surrendered to gratitude. It wasn’t anything big, nothing life transforming, but the basic act of taking a grumbling and complaining attitude and flipping it over to thankfulness revealed to me more power than I could have expected in the day to day realities of life. It goes hand in hand with contentment too, and I ask you to pray for supernatural grace in continuing to exchange each complaint for praise. (Only teachers understand how really difficult this is to do in a workplace festering with gossip and complaining)

I pulled together a bunch of sentences from a book called “One Thousand Gifts” that is challenging me a lot.

“We only enter into the full life if our faith gives thanks. Thanksgiving is inherent to a true salvation experience; thanksgiving is necessary to live the well, whole, fullest life. As long as thanks is possible, then joy is always possible. The holy grail of joy is not in some exotic location or some emotional mountain peak experience. The joy wonder could be here, in the messy, piercing, aching now. When we find ourselves groping along, famished for more, we can choose. (Phil. 4:11-12) Learn how to be thankful – whether empty or full, to learn how to be grateful and happy, whether hands full or empty. The only place we need to see before we die is this place of seeing God, here and now. God’s in the details; God is in the moment. God is in all that blurs by in a life – even hurts in life. I yearn for the stuff of saints, the hard language, the fluency of thanksgiving in all, even the ugliest and most heartbreaking. I want the very fullest life.”

About a week ago I was finally feeling back to the norm again when I was asked to help with a medical missions team coming from the states to do ministry in surrounding towns outside the city. I gladly joined in, but had no idea what God was about to teach me through his faithful servants on this team. As I translated, prayed with patients, handed out parasite medicine, and acted as nurse for some poor kiddos who got their teeth yanked I saw the hands and feet of Christ at work. Most of the team was retired people, one couple in their 80’s who had been coming down to serve each year for over a decade. Each had over time built relationships with people they visited each year, and themselves did not complain a single moment about any of the inconveniences of a 3^rd world country. One lady just sat next to me for almost 5 hours filling up cups of water as we administered parasite medicine. Every once in awhile she would say, “A cup of water in the name of Jesus.”

This team showed me that missions work, done through committed community and unity could be extremely effective.

I was amazed at the story of one man sharing with me about how he sponsors 3 children through Compassion International. He decided that every time a grandchild was born he would support a child in Honduras. Since he’s been coming down with the medical team each year, he’s been able to visit each of them and build relationships with the three girls he sponsors and be part of their lives. I wish we could do more ministry like this, simply sharing and caring and maybe GOING to be with them, like Jesus came to us, to understand, to be one of us, and to show us His love in a tangible way, not just by sending money and gifts, but a relationship with Himself, which is far greater a gift.

Monday was a hard day back with the kids because I wanted so much to reject the selfishness I saw in the 21 eyes staring at me, wanting to shout, at them “Do you know what you have?” The Lord softened my heart and also brought some neat classroom experiences this week. On Tuesday a team from YWAM was in town and shared with the elementary at chapel that morning. The team was hanging out at the school, so I asked if a few of the students from different countries could come into my class and talk to my kids about prayer for the nations and encourage them. God sent 4 specifically passionate students who shared in a real way with my kids who were completely tuned in to listening the whole time. They talked about praying big prayers and knowing that God hears even though they may not receive results, or feel like only one person….through prayer they can change the world and there is so much value in learning the discipline of prayer. When we finished I gathered the kids in the back of the classroom to pray and one of the YWAM people suggested praying “Korean Style” – all out loud at the same time – my students wholeheartedly agreed and it was the sweetest thing to hear all their voices in unison crying out to the King of the Universe. When the kids quieted down the team kept praying over my class and their beautifully prophetic words awakened excitement and passion to continue in prayer and faith.

Directly after this time of sharing in prayer, the Lord led us into a time of mourning over the people in our lives who have passed on. One student had just reached the two year mark of his brother dying in a house fire and another student recently lost a close grandparent…..from this beginning of sharing and opening up we began talking about death and what it feels like to lose someone close to you. The whole conversation was brought on by the Spirit and we

On two different occasions this past week I had students from last year tell me that last year was the best year of their lives….God continues to answer prayer as time passes and realizations come. I’m so thankful to receive such encouragement as I continue to wait on the Lord.

My next big mountain to climb is chapel this coming week on Thursday morning, which has been overwhelmingly difficult this year. It is a fine balance between wanting the kids to take leadership and ownership, and making sure it’s not a disaster….I told the kids Friday morning that I was feeling like our chapel was going to be one of those impossible things that we can’t accomplish unless God comes in and saves the day, and so instead of practicing and trying to throw it all together, we spent a lot of time praying and surrendering the lesson and the planning to God and asking Him to teach through us. I know that He will do whatever He wants through us, and that it will be better this way, but it is still a little stressful as it comes down to the wire, so please keep us in your prayers. Our main message is about living the active Christian life and not being lukewarm Christians….we want to really challenge the 5^th and 6^th grade students to have a bigger perspective and be prepared for when the battle comes.

Here are my other prayer requests as we head into this next month:

- I am starting a new inductive bible study with my small group and need prayer for the Lord to teach us from His word, and a commitment to studying and growing together.

- I am waiting for confirmation, but am closer to making a decision for my plans for next year, please keep praying for me to wait on the Lord in hearing from Him specifically.

- More opportunities to serve the community and people here as the Lord is opening my heart and eyes more to this

- Relationships living in community as we head into the hardest “realest” part of the year and learn and grow together as we push past boundaries and speak the truth in love to one another and see God shape and change. (1 Pet. 1:22)

- That I would keep believing in faith that God would answer big prayers, and be more faithful in prayer.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=foVRP07WOAg

Diciembre -- Back from Thanksgiving and awaiting Christmas

2011-12-11T18:02:00.000-08:00

Since the last time I wrote there has been much activity and things to write home about, most of them stemming from a trip over Thanksgiving to Nicaragua. The following is a summary of a lot of thoughts that have been running through my head, -- ideas, and realizations….I think I need to share them with you because I’m on the verge of something….not quite sure what yet.

Most of you have been with me on my journey first to Nicaragua and then Honduras so you know how much I love that place and country, but I can’t really describe to you what it was like driving down those roads again, stepping into memorized houses, smelling the same smells, and delighting in the people that first claimed my heart. Nicaragua was most definitely a whole other world, a world I love. Our time was so short, yet so sweet.

We first went to the orphanage in Jinotega that is my favorite and cooked Thanksgiving dinner for them and then played with the kids and watched Elf on the big screen. It was quite the event to be a part of, moments cherished in my heart.

On Friday we headed to Managua and I managed to navigate my way all the way through the city without having a clue where I was going….many many steps of faith on this journey and God came through in EVERY SINGLE ONE.

I spent Friday night with my host family, hearing about what the Lord is doing in their lives. My host dad is a pastor who is highly esteemed all over the country. His sermons are radio broadcasted and he has invitations to speak in dozens of churches every week. He runs all over proclaiming the name of Christ and hardly rests. It was hard again to see the effect this has on the family, but he has a truly amazing ministry. On Saturday we spent the day with my dearest friends Isabel and her son Fran. We tried cone-ing in the mall and then ended up at a cute little coffee shop. I pulled Isabel aside at one point, leaving Trent and Fran to play cards at another table. We talked about everything going on in her life and she took the burden on her shoulders and gave it all to me, it was much. We prayed together and cried together and I could just see relief in her eyes knowing that someone understood, someone cared, someone had taken the time to listen and love her no matter what. When we went back to the boys I was surprised again by the Lord. Trent said that Fran and him had been talking and Fran needed to tell me something. Fran looked at me and said, “It is time for me to accept Jesus into my heart.”

I was astounded, but overjoyed, as this was something his mom and I had just been talking about and something I have prayed for through many years. We decided to go home and pray together. As we sat on that porch, a place where some of the most cherished evenings were spent lifting up praises to God amidst hardship, we all joined hands and ushered Fran into the presence of the Lord Most High.

I had so much emotion running through me as I said goodbye to them. Isabel clung to me, Fran just shone with joy, and my heart burst with love for them and thankfulness to God. Through a few tears on the way home I realized some things. 1.) I loved that time with Isabel and Fran because it was so real. The hardships in their lives were opened and laid bare before me, although I really can do nothing to change them, I partner with them in prayer. I had to specifically take that burden that Isabel shared with me and lay it before the Lord, reminding myself that He will never leave them or forsake them, and they are His children, His sheep. He will constantly care for them, my role is to share, understand, and PRAY.

2.) Missions work is not necessarily this grandiose romanticized idea we sometimes make of it, it is simply getting involved in people’s lives, walking with them where they are at, ministering to their needs, and being Christ’s hands and feet….after all, that is what Christ did in all His ministry on earth and said we would be blessed if we followed His example. We preach the gospel with our lives as living testimonies and then words. We are meant to share our lives, they are not our own.

3.) I have not been living the way I should in a manner that keeps in mind this whole other reality of life. I have been content in my reality and must admit, did not want to carry the burden and guilt that comes along with allowing myself to SEE. My eyes now opened again meant that from now on it is extremely hard to hide from their reality….the reality of thousands who live just as they….wondering where the food on their table will come from, wondering if they will have strength to get up in the morning and work a 14 hour day for pennies that never stretch far enough, wondering if anyone cares or if life will ever get better, wondering if depression will take over or her husband will ever come back….. I am so thankful that God continues to present to me this reality and tugs my heart so fully on behalf of His beloved people.

4.) Dreams and visions from the past were again stirred in my heart and mind. I want to go to them, to live among them, to be like them, to do ministry on that level such as 2 Corinthians 6 describes – “Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as impostors; known, yet regarded as unknown; dying, and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything.”

Since this moment of eye opening realizations I have been mulling over a lot of things in my head, bigger things, scary things, God shaped things.

Speaking with my kids at school after getting back from Nicaragua I talked to them about dreaming big and seeking God’s purpose for their lives. We are studying Joshua in bible class and reading in the 1^st chapter of Joshua where God speaks to the Israelites: “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”

The Lord transfers the leadership of His people from Moses to Joshua and it is time to take over the Promised Land. God knows the Israelites need to remember the promises He made to them and the reminders of His power and faithfulness as they face the “giants” of the land and follow crazy commands like walking around the walls of Jericho.

I’m feeling a little like the Israelites right now, stuck in my unbelief, but asking for more faith to know that God can do whatever He wants with me. He’s asking me to meditate on His promises and take courage to believe that God will perform the deeds He has declared. I’ve been very weak in really understanding this for over a week now, but after a day of fasting and praying God has stripped my gaze of earthly things and I can now much more easily gaze at the clarity of the truth God has spoken over my life. I was actually quite selfish in my relationship with the Lord after these things and the great possibility of change coming my way and wanted to run from it, instead of embracing whatever He gently speaks over me. I praise Him as the Good Shepherds who knows exactly how to direct our stubborn hearts, patiently, and beside quiet waters.

Below are a 2 quotes, one from a sermon by Matt Channing and the other an old prayer of surrender by Francois de la Mothe Fenelon. They have been encouraging on this journey, but because I know you’re getting tired of reading this novel, I will bring it to a close with my prayer needs. Thank you so much for your faithfulness. I am delighted to share with you where the Lord has me and allow you to see Him working in and through my life, whatever that may be. May the Lord grip your heart in whatever way He desires this Christmas season, and may you take time to be still before Him and remember that He is God…..it’s all about Him.

Prayer Requests

1.) Today marks 10 days until I get to return home for a short reprieve. I talked with my kids about finishing strong this part of the year and they are struggling. Please pray for motivation, excitement in the Christmas season, and grace to get us through. I’m headed into a meeting this morning with a parent of one of my troublesome students and would appreciate your prayers for wisdom in a behavior plan and in encouraging him and giving him the tools he needs to succeed.

2.) Continued rejection of the ideas the world so easily accepts and a heart surrendered to God’s will, whatever that may be.

3.) An appreciation of friendships in this season and time amongst the craziness to have fun and celebrate and share life together.

4.) Isabel and Fran

5.) My time at home – wisdom in how to order my time and energy and also getting some rest and rejuvenation.

Matt Chandler:

Weaken and destroy the idea that God is ultimately for you. You have got to get over you. You’re not the point. The more you think you’re the point the more you will be enslaved to a million vices. When you’re the point you use others and you will easily be angered and bothered by others. When you’re not the point you’re free, you get to extend grace and rest and breath. How good it is to know that God is for Himself and that all He is doing is for the praise of His glorious name and that He has set us free from ourselves.

“Lord, I know not what I ought to ask of You, only You know what I need, You love me better than I know how to love myself. O Father! Give to me that which I myself know not how to ask. I dare not ask neither for crosses or consolations. I simply present myself before You, I open my heart to You. See and do according to Your will and tender mercy. Smite, or heal; depress me, or raise me up. I adore all Your purposes without knowing them. I am silent, I offer myself in sacrifice, I yield myself to You. I would have no other desire than to accomplish Your will. Teach me to pray. Pray thyself in me. Amen.” – Francois de la Mothe Fenelon –

News in November

2011-12-11T17:49:00.000-08:00

Headed into Thanksgiving and prepping for the intense craziness of the ever ominous holiday season fastly approaching. Ready, set, go......

Honduras is going through a realization of change that has taken place over the last years (maybe decade) as humanity has shifted and a parallel is probably seen across the board. However, I experience the change here in a different, more clear way and that is that Honduras is not a safe place. Tegucigalpa has been transformed into a major stop on the drug trafficking highway and the problems that arise with this are grave indeed.

As a school we dealt with the death of a parent of 3 graduated Pinares students --she was a lawyer, fighting hard against the drug crimes happening in this country. She walked with the power of God and caught and convicted many enemies. On Monday one of them finished her ministry to the Lord, leaving 70 bullets in her body.

The injustice of it all raged in our hearts as we tried to comprehend such a thing that hit so close to our community.

I was at a friend’s house with a Spanish teacher from school and we were talking about this thing that happened as we were driving home on Saturday and having a conversation about the many crimes happening all over. She was in the middle of saying “You never know what could happen anywhere you are, you just have to walk in the protection of the Lord” when two “ladrónes” (thieves) jumped in the back of her truck and began peering through the windows at us. They rode in the back of the truck for a half an hour and waited until we were stuck in hard core traffic and unable to move. At that point the 2 men got out on either side and knocked on the driver and passenger side windows. Laura and I were both praying the whole time for the Lord’s protection and covering in the situation and as it intensified within seconds Laura began yelling, “In the name of Jesus may these men not harm us. In the name of Jesus may they leave us alone. In the name of Jesus may this traffic start moving, may the blood of Jesus protect us…..” and as I expected to see a gun pointed at my head when we looked up, I saw nothing, had no fear, a miracle happened and the traffic started moving and Laura stepped on the gas, leaving the men behind. They did not chase us, and we arrived home with hearts beating rapidly.

Wherever we go, whatever we do, we need to be walking in His presence and peace. We have nothing to fear for He is with us, we are His, we are His people, the sheep of His pasture. We have a good Shepherd, we have a mighty Master, lets walk in faith daily in whatever situations present themselves.

Psalm 34 has been such an encouragement to me lately and as I reflected on God’s grace Saturday night in a situation that could have gone so wrong, and yet was miraculously not a big deal I praised the Lord with verses 15-17: “The eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous and His ears are open to their cry. The face of the LORD is against evildoers, to cut off the memory of them from the earth. The righteous cry and the Lord hears and delivers then out of all their troubles.”

Below are some more stories, quotes, scripture verses, lessons, and prayer requests. Thanks again for taking the time to listen and enter my world. I hope you are blessed and encouraged.

Disciple making… a bigger vision amidst the mundane day to day.

“Making disciples is not an easy process. It is trying. It is messy. It is slow, tedious, even painful at times. It is all these things because it is relational. Jesus has not given us an effortless step-by-step formula for making disciples. He has given us people, and he has said, “Live for them. Love them, serve the, and lead them. Lead them to follow me, and lead them to lead others to follow me. In the process you will multiply the gospel to the ends of the earth.” (93)

à And thus describes my day to day life as a teacher: relational, messy, slow, trying, even painful at times….but God has given me these children this year, to raise up as His disciples. What a task. What a joy. You could pay me millions of dollars or pennies, it wouldn’t matter, because each day I know I get to fill God’s command by making disciples of all nations in my day to day commitment to the lives of these kids. Their minds are open to deep spiritual truths, their eyes are open to the lost, their tongues ready to utter prayers on behalf of the nations, their hearts desiring to be transformed into the image of Christ. Please pray for this bigger vision of raising up these children in the things of the Lord, though I only get to get my hands dirty with them for a year, God has called me to this ministry, and is doing all things for me.

I encourage you not to get discouraged in the discipleship tasks the Lord has put in your life, especially the ones you’ve labored over for years and still struggle to see fruits and impact. Which brings me to my next lesson….

Hope of a harvest….reminders of God’s work despite the results I see

At church we were discussing James 5: 7-21

The first part of this passage starts out:

“Therefore be patient, brethren, until the coming of the Lord. The farmer waits for the precious produce of the soil, being patient about it, until it gets the early and late rains. You too be patient; strengthen your hearts, for the coming of the Lord is near…..you have heard of the endurance of Job and have seen the outcome of the Lord’s dealings…that the Lord is full of compassion and is merciful.”

The pastor was encouraging us as farmers. He said that a good farmer would never stand at the door to his house, throw out a bunch of handfuls of seeds, and expect to see a harvest months later. A farmer’s job takes patience and endurance, he has to walk the fields and plant each seed step by step in careful rows, till the soil, water it carefully, wait and watch and pray for the early and late rains….then and only when he has completed his hard labor does he expects a harvest.

I have seen testimony of the Lord’s compassion and mercy as I labor to plant and patiently serve as a farmer here in this place – a teacher has no other choice. I get such a short time to influence their hearts and minds, yet it is such as task.

One morning I was discouraged looking at my kids from last year, the way they would rather ignore me than interact, the way I loved them and prayed for them, and they never ever would say thank you, when I see them love other teachers and realize how deprived I was of their love….my heart hurts as that farmer who is anxiously waiting the harvest and sees rejection instead, roots that did not grow down deep and plants that withered.

My kids LOVE me this year, and every day I feel the effects of that love and I see the appreciation in their eyes. I am so blessed to get to be the teacher I want to be here, and this year they accept me.

But in contrast, I couldn’t figure out what happened all last year, when I labored day in and day out and feel like I don’t see any sort of harvest. I don’t feel like I did anything right, or made any difference. I told God about this, knowing that they were lies, but admitting the doubts nonetheless because of the way I was being treated and what I experienced. I had to come to the point of understanding that maybe the only fruit I would see was in the formation of my own character and what God did in my heart and how He changed me. And that had to be enough for me at this point.

So the words from James were exactly what I needed to hear….”Remember Job and his perseverance? Remember what the Lord finally brought about? Remember that the Lord is full of mercy and compassion?”

Romans 5:5 – Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance character, and character hope….and hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, who He has given us.”

That afternoon, after confessing my doubts before the Lord, He made sure to send some encouragement my way. Another teacher happened to be sitting on the bus next to one of my kids from last year and through random conversation asked her what her favorite year and teacher has been at Pinares. She responded “Ms. Nyhoff’s class last year,” to which the teacher asked why. She responded, “Because we all started out the year hating each other, and by the end we all loved each other.”

(This is one of the kids that will hardly look at me, but the life lesson had been planted and sown in her….producing the fruits of righteousness I had prayed so hard for, completely unbeknownst to me.)

I must say that God and I had another talk, and some more confession time that night. If only I had faith to believe that not only did those trials produce in ME perseverance and character I should know that I would never be disappointed in hope as God, through His Holy Spirit, is working in our hearts, in the hearts and lives of my kids last year, and this year. Those seeds sown in faith DO produce fruit of righteousness. I thank God for this simple and sweet reminder and I want to challenge you as well, all you faithful servants of the Lord ministering in faithfulness, sowing, watering, persevering, praying….the Lord is using you as you wait and hope for a harvest, and as you wait know that God is working on your character in the meantime. I pray that that is enough to fill you with joy in serving Him each day, no matter what the task.

In the meantime…another lesson has been clearly defined:

Thankfulness that transcends…..the Holy Spirit living in us

“Oh how I wish it was enough for you and for me to do something just because God has told us to.”

“Whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him” (Col. 3:17)

God’s command to be thankful is not the threatening demand of a tyrant, rather the invitation of a lifetime – the opportunity to draw near to Him at any moment of the day. If you’re sitting down to dinner, be thankful. If you’re getting up to go to bed, be thankful. If you’re coming out from under a two-week cold and cough, if you’re paying bills, if you’re cleaning up after overnight company, if you’re driving to work, if you’re changing a light bulb, if you’re worshiping in a church service, if you’re visiting a friend in the hospital, if you’re picking up kids form school or practice….Be thankful. God has commanded it – for our good and His glory.” (63-64)

The fact is, we cannot whine and complain and be filled with the Spirit at the same time. When a thankful spirit resides in our hearts and expresses itself on our lips, it’s an evidence that the Holy Spirit lives in us, that we are yielding to His control, and that He is producing His gracious fruit in and through our lives. (71)

As we head into Thanksgiving I am even more clearly reminded of the thankful spirit that should abide in my heart and drip from my lips, overflowing from a heart yielded to the control of the Spirit and turning a cold shoulder to those complaints I so easily latch unto.

Please pray with me:

- That the Lord would continue to give me vision and insight, and not just for the here and now, but open eyes for the work of His Holy Spirit whatever that may be.

- For wisdom and guidance as I begin praying about a decision for what I will do next year. (reading in Exodus 40 about the Israelites following God’s presence in a cloud by day and a fire by night and where it rested the Israelites stayed, and when it moved they followed….that is what I want, to follow God’s presence)

- For safety and protection as I continue to trust the Lord living in a semi-dangerous part of the world and see the evil and pain this causes all around

- For grace as I seek to live each day completely surrendered to the Lord for each moment (He is making sure to test me on this, and it is hard to trust and simply obey at times)

- rest -- surprisingly still hard for me to find ;)

October Details and Discoveries

2011-12-11T17:44:00.000-08:00

Is it already half way through October already?!?!?!

Hello from Honduras again! If the past month has flown by at the same pace it has for me, I assume that this update will come as a surprise, but I am so excited to update you on what the Lord is doing here.

I have been gazing longingly at pictures splashed with the golden rays of fall in Colorado and missing being home for this season. Please make sure you enjoy every falling leaf for me, I am with you in spirit to enjoy the crisp autumn air and pumpkin spiced lattes!

There are some key repeated Spanish words I want to teach you for this update that will help me summarize and communicate better:

Llena (yena)– full

Aprovechar (a- pro-ve- char)– to take advantage of, to make the most of, to use to the fullest

Sabiduria (saw-bee-dure- y-a) -- wisdom

Espiritu (Eh- speer-y-too)– spirit

Agradecida (awe-graw-de-see-da) – thankful

My time has been llena in this season, full to the brim of relationships, laughter, challenging conversations, prayer and worship, joy of the Lord, and peace that passes all understanding. I have been able to aprovechar each day in living it to the fullest.

I asked you to pray for sabiduria in my past update and I have seen the Lord answering in amazing ways – ways way beyond myself. (more on that in a minute)

The Holy Espiritu has been revealing Himself to me in new and exciting ways. I have prayed for a long time to understand this personhood of my God and I am just beginning to feel the drizzle of the downpour that I know is held in the cloud of the presence of the indwelling Espiritu of God.

I have been learning gratitude on a whole other level as I study and allow the Lord to challenge my heart and attitude to be agradecida to the Lord in action, in word, and in spirit….knowing that this transforms circumstances, days, and lives in a big way when lived out in community and challenged by the schemes of the evil one.

I started out with the word llena because of the fullness I am seeing and feeling right now, I know it’s going to spill over in this update, and I hope that it will be encouraging and “filling” to you in whatever circumstances you are facing right now.

(yes, I just hit page number 1 and I’m just now ready to start….you guys are always so amazing to stick with me through the novels I write – Thanks J)

In my care group the past couple of weeks I have noticed a theme that the Lord keeps bringing to my attention involving the Holy Espiritu. There was a quote in the book we are reading about prayer that really hit me.

“Maybe you are going through a struggle in your life. A tragedy strikes you or someone close to you, and you’re hurting. So you go to God in prayer, and you ask him to comfort you. Do you realize what God does? He doesn’t give you comfort, instead He gives you the Holy Spirit, who is called the Comforter. The Holy Spirit literally comes to dwell in you and puts the very comfort of Christ inside you as you walk through your pain. Suppose another time you are making a big decision in your life, and you need help. You have a couple of different options before you, and you need guidance to decide which way is best. So you ask God for help. But He doesn’t answer with guidance. Instead He answers by sending the Holy Spirit, who is our Guide. The Holy Spirit is the Comforter, the Helper, the Guide, the very presence of God living in you. This is the great promise of God in prayer. We ask God for gifts in prayer, and he gives us the Giver. We ask God for supply and He gives us the Source. He puts His very power in us so we might have all we need to accomplish his purposes in this world.” (David Platt – Radical Pg. 58)

Something I have come to realize is that my prayers reflect not the expectation of the Holy Espiritu, but of God’s provision of what I ask. I don’t know or understand the Holy Spirit very well, but as I am learning to seek HIM in prayer, not the things he provides, I am coming to know a whole different God, the one that abides in my heart and is full of every good thing, ready to spill out of me in the confrontation of any need. This is changing me at the very core of who I am.

This week at school I hit some hard walls with students. One is very argumentative and wants to blame all his problems on me, which works well for him because his mom is a lawyer and tried to sue the school and teacher last year based on the “unfair treatment” of her child and “malpractice” of the past teacher. As I deal with this child and parent I am filled with the knowledge that the Lord is my defender and that He has completely equipped me for the work He has called me to in this child’s life, there is no reason to fear. I have the Holy Espiritu to guide me in the best way to handle this. He gives me grace, patience, sabiduria, and strength to love this child….how exciting to live in this way, and in a way that truly impacts my kids as they see GOD living and breathing in and through me each day, each moment as I call on His Espiritu.

Another student was caught cheating this week and lied to my face 3 times, even though she had revealed herself a liar without even knowing it. She kept falling to the cycle of sin as her lie grew bigger and bigger and eventually trapped her. When I see roots of evil and sin reaching so deeply into a child’s heart is hurts me, but there is also a passion in me that is stirred…a passion to see the truth revealed and the evil one defeated and I have been receiving a vision from the Lord in the work He desires in the heart of His children. As a teacher I get the special privilege to partner with the 20 children in my classroom through joys and trials, through triumphs over the sinful nature and the revelation of sin and the process of overcoming and encouraging, correcting and guiding. I am so agradecida for this task, but I realize the gravity of it as well and desire to take it seriously.

Note: What a picture of every believers daily walk with the Lord in community….I pray for more sin revealed in all of our lives, and more partnering with one another to overcome. We need to lay aside the complacency of accepting one another’s sin and looking past it, we need to speak the truth to one another in love and claim God’s victory with visions of His glory in one another’s lives.

There are so many more stories to share, but these are some I need prayer and want to share with you as I journey. I love the kids God has given me, and I am excited to keep sharing with you all God’s work in and through each of them….and through me.

As I walk through this season I am agradecida to God for each joy and triumph, each hardship and struggle. One of my mentors shared with me that life never really follows the high and low pattern, but more of a “railroad track” analogy of the good alongside the bad, always balancing one another out, but we get to decide which side of the tracks we ride on. A thankful heart truly is a happy heart. God is showing me this truth each morning as I wait on Him to give me perspective and fill my heart with that thankfulness that shines forth, no matter how strong that other side of the track is pulling on me.

So, to summarize the fullness(llena) that I just dumped on you, I am aprovechando this time the Lord has given me, but ask for your prayers to continue in this Espiritu with a corazon agradecida(thankful heart) and the sabiduria that the Lord has given me through the personhood of Himself in my heart and mind.

Thank you for your prayers. Be challenged to weed out sin, call on the Holy Spirit’s fullness in your heart, and choose thankfulness and watch the transformation of the living and breathing God in your hearts and lives to make the most of every opportunity….for the days are evil.

(I hope the Spanish words were not too confusing, but I have to aprovechar every teaching moment -- lets face it, we could all use some more Spanish in our lives ;)

September Update

2011-12-11T17:26:00.001-08:00

It has been a long process to finally sit down and write out an update on the first 6 weeks of life here in Honduras. So many things God has been doing and I finally feel at a place where I can take a step back and adequately describe ways I’ve seen the Lord working in and through me. A lot of you have received pieces over the past weeks as I’ve tried to tie everything together, so I will try to be brief and fill you in as simply as possible, but you all know how difficult that is for me.

The last time you heard from me in update format I was struggling with returning to teaching after just finishing my first difficult year and knowing how much I would be needed to pour out my time and energy in leadership this year. When I got here I struggled a lot. Everything was different. I didn’t expect a bad attitude to attack so quickly. My best friends left spaces in my world here when they left the year before and the new people already had a community formed and I felt like an outsider coming to a home I had created, but missing my Colorado home. My flight was delayed a day returning here, so I came in extra late and felt a hug amount of catch-up lay ahead. I became team leader of 5^th grade and was placed with 2 male teachers who right off the bat were excited to jump in, but very needy of my time and attention in preparing them for the year and all the details. I spent a lot of nights for the first 8 days in my classroom till 11pm – something I thought only 1^st year teachers were supposed to do, but as it turned out, I was essentially preparing my classroom and 2 others at the same time.

At this point I had to come to a moment of surrender to the Lord where I just gave up trying to have my own time, to have more than 5 hours of sleep a night, and trust the Lord with the energy, wisdom, and joy to get through all that needed to be done….with a good attitude and not worrying about things getting done! This surrender of my time was a key point.

The 1^st day of school was another point that changed things. We were eventually ready after all the initial craziness and the 5^th grade team showed up matching on the 1^st day. (see picture) The moment I saw and talked to my kids my heart and mind were put to ease. The kids flooded in, all excited, all warm and happy, I knew from their faces and the words they wrote in prayer for our school year that this was an entirely new class.I have since been having a BLAST teaching. I can mostly say this because I am constantly comparing to all the feelings of last year and the struggles that were part of my every day. Not to say that there are not struggled with this class, I will soon be writing you home about students that are driving me crazy and difficulties we are having, but as of now, I am enjoying the freedom to be as I am as a teacher and knowing the kids will accept that and that 5C is already becoming a special family that desires to love the Lord and serve Him together. This is the deepest desire of my heart in teaching these kids and already I am seeing fruit in their lives and hearts.

Our community here has been adjusting. My two new roommates are wonderful and refreshing and we are getting along great. Everyone is flexible and accepting. What a change has taken over the apartment! (see picture)

I began leading the small group bible study the 2^nd week of school and praise God for the set apart and beautiful women He placed in my group. We are already spurring one another on to Christ and jumping into the book “Radical” which will be challenging and life changing.

Slowly I have been figuring out where I will fit between the new teachers and the old and I’m letting the Lord fill the empty spaces of those who left last year, although their absence strikes deep down sometimes. God has been answering prayers with relationships and I’ve been spending a lot more time with my Honduran friends and at church, which is a desired change and exciting growth. This always involves lots of tortillas, time spent crammed on some form of public transportation, laughter over Spanish blunders, and watching the Lord orchestrate relationships as He does best.

This weekend we had Thursday and Friday off for Independence Day, which was already a welcomed break. I was initially looking at traveling to an orphanage on the coast, but based on the system of communication we have here in Honduras everything fell through. I was organizing the trip for myself and 3 other teachers and felt horrible that we were stuck with nothing to do on our break. But I have been amazed at how the Lord takes that time that I have already surrendered to Him and directs each moment of each day.

I have never found more joy in living completely surrendered to the Lord in every thought and action. I know that this is the only way that I have seen success in every aspect of my life in these first weeks – because it has been the Lord in and through all things. I refuse to worry about things, control things, make choices apart from prayer, attempt relationships apart from the spirit’s leading, and work ahead of the Lord’s timing or direction.

I was confronted with some hard scripture in which the Lord spoke of His promises and how He wanted to use me and bless the work of my hands as I died to myself and let Him do the living and moving and breathing. I am without excuse to His work and He has equipped me and called me – Yet He still has to accomplish all things for me for HIS glory. I step forth with faith into each day and have been loving this new freedom I have found in my walk with the Lord.

This morning I was camping with some friends on top of a mountain and the Lord woke me up early to see clouds moving through the valley below and the sun peeking it’s head up behind the mountains across from me….it was breath taking. As I sat there and spoke with my Creator and King I read from 2 Cor. 3 and 4 – “And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit….for we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that His life may be revealed in our mortal bodies.”

There is so much more to share, ups and downs, and u-turns and hairpin curves…..life has been quite a FULL adventure. I am content, joyful, and pressing onward. THANK YOU for your prayers and for partnering with me. I have been extremely encouraged by the e-mails I have been receiving and just having you all be part of my life here. Love you all and pray for you often and with much desire to see the Lord at work in each of your lives for His glory as well!

Prayer Requests:

continued blessing and wisdom in relationships here (James 3: 13, 17-18)

- That I would be a teacher after the heart of my Teacher and Lord (Ecc. 12:9-14)

- That I would continue to die to myself, my plans, my thoughts and desires, and that Christ would reign and work in and through me in this place (John 12: 24-26)

- That my small group would dive head long into what the Lord has to teach us this year and that we would learn and grow together (Hebrews 10:23-25)

Returning for round 2 of teaching in Honduras!

2011-08-06T23:05:00.000-07:00

I am preparing for another school year and adventure in Honduras for which I leave in 5 days! Summer has been extremely short with only 6 weeks to fit in everything and then mentally and spiritually prepare to return for a whole new year!
Thank you so much for those of you who sat down and had conversations with me this summer about all the struggles and some highlights of the past year, they wer so helpful in processing through what the Lord has and will do through this whole experience.
Thank you for your love and prayers for me as I journey, I have just felt so filled and loved by each and every one of you. I don't understand why I am so blessed with the friends and family I have, but man, God is good in demonstrating His love for me specifically through all of you, and especially in this short summer time.

The Lord spoke some specific things to me through His word in helping to restore my heart and mind and prepare me for my return. I want to share this with you if I have not already, though it may have come out in bits and pieces.

When I came home this summer part of me felt like a complete failure as a teacher. Some things that happened at the end of the year led me to be very down and depressed about the whole past year. Sometimes a bad ending and closure tints everything. The Lord kindly and directly led me to this passage in Matthew 26:6-13 --
The Precious Ointment
6 Now when Jesus was in Bethany, at the home of Simon the leper, 7 a woman came to Him with an alabaster vial of very costly perfume, and she poured it on His head as He reclined at the table. 8 But the disciples were indignant when they saw this, and said, “Why this waste? 9 For this perfume might have been sold for a high price and the money given to the poor.” 10 But Jesus, aware of this, said to them, “Why do you bother the woman? For she has done a good deed to Me. 11 For you always have the poor with you; but you do not always have Me. 12 For when she poured this perfume on My body, she did it to prepare Me for burial. 13 Truly I say to you, wherever this gospel is preached in the whole world, what this woman has done will also be spoken of in memory of her.”

Through this passage the Lord showed me that I had been leaning on the indignation of the disciples in regards to the service and work I had just poured out to the Lord in the past year. I felt like it was wasted in some sense, that nothing was accomplished, and that it would have been better to serve the poor with my gifts and talents, not the rich kids the Lord has called me to love and serve humbly. I was believing the lies and it took the Lord looking me straight in the eyes and saying, "You have done a good deed UNTO ME." I was so broken over my sin and failure to see that it didn't matter if I saw results, if I made a difference, if I was a good teacher, if others approved of what I do......I was simply pleasing and serving and pouring out my life unto the Lord, who is beyond worthy of every sacrifice and painful offering He asks me to give. As I turned to worship, instead of complaining I saw my Father do amazing things in my heart and mind as He renewed me in Him to return, to continue giving and serving, no matter the cost....no matter the fruit. I leave that all up to Him and I just anoint my Lord with what He has asked me to give.

Thus, I have new vision and passion in returning to Honduras in this upcoming week. BUT, I need your prayers and continued support to run the race marked out for me in this next season.

Here are some prayer requests:
- 2 new roommates I get the opportunity to live with and impact
- 21 new students (who appear to be quite a roudy bunch :)
- 2 new partner teachers to lead and train
- a small group to lead and to challenge as we live in community together
- a church to grow with and serve with and learn from (Capillo Calvario)
- making new friends with the 25 new teachers coming and opening myself up again to new relationships
- confidence and faith as the Lord directs me now as a "leader" though I don't feel ready or prepared enough

Here is the next passage the Lord spoke over me in giving me vision for this next year:

Isaiah 49: 1-6
1 Listen to Me, O islands,
And pay attention, you peoples from afar.
The LORD called Me from the womb;
From the body of My mother He named Me.
2 He has made My mouth like a sharp sword,
In the shadow of His hand He has concealed Me;
And He has also made Me a select arrow,
He has hidden Me in His quiver.
3 He said to Me, “You are My Servant, Israel,
In Whom I will show My glory.”
4 But I said, “I have toiled in vain,
I have spent My strength for nothing and vanity;
Yet surely the justice due to Me is with the LORD,
And My reward with My God.”
5 And now says the LORD, who formed Me from the womb to be His Servant,
To bring Jacob back to Him, so that Israel might be gathered to Him
(For I am honored in the sight of the LORD,
And My God is My strength),
6 He says, “It is too small a thing that You should be My Servant
To raise up the tribes of Jacob and to restore the preserved ones of Israel;
I will also make You a light of the nations
So that My salvation may reach to the end of the earth."

Thank you again dear friends. Please let me know how I can be interceding for you and what the Lord is teaching you, nothing delights me more. I love you all and thank you for your partnership for the gospel of Christ.

And a link to a song that has ministered in the same way by Chris McClarney called "Waste it all"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umkbx6DQiSs

May Honduras -- POR FIN!

2011-08-06T18:17:00.001-07:00

The end of my first year of teaching: Crazy and difficult

I almost went insane, but God carried me through to the end. Nothing about it was easy, or good.

With a visit from my mom and Sarah to carry me to the last week, the end was in sight, but so much to happen before I could come home. Parents to yell, kids to go nuts, grades to finish, goodbyes to be said.....I'm so thankful it is over now.

My metaphor: it was like running the hardest race of my life and getting to the end and finding there is no prize, there is no one there to cheer you on, just sweat, tears, and a tremendous beating heart.

All this to say, I'm ready to come home. I'm tired, and God has 6 weeks for some rest and rejuvination, because next year is an ominous and fearful sight just around the corner.

A trip to Tela at the end, reflecting on God's faithfulness and blessing the Lord for what He did in and through us, as well as spending last moments in sweet friendships.

April -- Semana Santa/Spring Break

2011-08-06T18:07:00.000-07:00

Happy Easter and Greetings from Honduras!

After making it through a grueling stretch of school without breaks everyone staggered into Semana Santa in desperate need of a break and some rejuvenation.
I must say that I had no idea how difficult it would be to guide 20 children through 94 solid days of school in a row with a one day break for a random cancelation. By Wednesday I had completely lost it and felt like a madwoman. Patience was gone and the kids had had enough and we had no choice but to just push through to the end. So our 10 day break came at JUST the right moment.
I prayed for a long time about what Semana Santa would look like for me and how to spend that time and found that when submitting plans to the Lord He always has more planned than I could ask.
Saturday morning at 3am we boarded a bus that began a 15 hour travel day and many adventures. I didn’t realize the amazing amount of traveling I was committing myself to within a short period of time, but when I got home on Monday afternoon I added the travel hours and it came out to be 53 ½ hours altogether, which adds up to a lot of time on a bus, staring out the window and praying for many many many things.
In-between long bus rides I found myself remembering what it feels like to be a real person again as we frolicked on the beaches of El Salvador, went on a zip-line canopy tour, ate fish and shrimp and talked for hours amidst the ambiance of candlelight and crashing waves and just found everything to be like a fairy tale. I was amidst wonderful company with my friend Gina and her sister and best friend who came down to visit.
On Tuesday I began the long travels back to Tegucigalpa and then got up at 3:30 am Wed. morning to board yet another bus to head out to a tiny pueblo in the middle of the Honduran mountains, completely switching gears. This time I accompanied my Honduran friend Waldina to her family’s rural farm house, which was just the adventure I was looking for. There were so many moments that I just had to throw my head back and laugh because it was so fun, and yet so crazy!
To describe a little bit of the setting in which I spent 6 lovely days I’ll tell you some of my favorite moments:
- Mashing our own corn to make tortillas over a fire
- Dozens of chickens, 4 turkeys, and 4 dogs always running around our feet (one of which we killed and then ate for Easter dinner on Sunday!)
- Thousands of flickering fireflies at night dancing all around
- Enjoying afternoon rainstorms from the hammocks on the front porch
- Packing 15-18 people in the back of a truck and bumping along 4 wheel drive roads to a random river where we crossed a huge suspended bridge to find hot springs bubbling up in the middle of the road and a random mariachi band to sing for us, then spending the afternoon swimming in the river and playing a lively soccer match on the shore.
- Climbing trees with machete in hand to hack down dozens of mangos, of which we devoured way too many!
- Washing my clothes by hand on rocks by a stream and realizing what it is like to live life with no running water…oh America, we are so blessed.
- Semana Santa sawdust carpet artwork and procession after procession flowing through the streets
- Slip sliding through mud in the rain on a 45 minute walk with luggage in hand at 3 in the morning to catch a bus to head home
- Huge spiders, a scorpion encounter, dozens of ant bites and quite a few mosquito bites to top off the real rural Honduras experience!
My friend Waldina approved my missionary status after I survived the week of craziness and enjoyed all the adventures. We laughed about my Spanish, talked about our crazy students, met new friends, tried new food, and enjoyed the calm, quiet, and rest of the life on the farm.

So, 2 completely different experiences all in one week, all of which could only be completely successful with the guidance and protection and faithfulness of the Lord.
There are many many more stories, but I am always way too long winded, so I will stop there.
Isaiah 40 has been my power verse to pump me up and push me through to the end of this school year. I meditated on this chapter every day of break. When you finish reading this e-mail, please stop and grab your bible and read it, because it is truly inspiring. Each of these verses in this chapter will carry me through till the end of the year in different ways and I continue to wait and hope in the Lord as He renews my strength and does for me more than I can ask of Him or imagine could come to pass. Please pray these verses over my kids and me as we finish out this school year.
Each and every one of you have been anointed in prayer over the past week as your faces flooded my mind through the long hours of travel. I miss you and will keep praying for you as well.

March Update -- Walls and breakthroughs....

2011-08-06T17:57:00.000-07:00

We made it half way through March! I know there’s a lot of spring break happening in the states this month, but ours does not come until the end of April which feels like a century away (only 34 days – but who’s counting?:)
I’ve been praying a lot for different missions trips going on, and it’s been fun to think about God’s work ALL over the world! We are part of such an amazing worldwide community!
So let me share with you a little bit about what God is doing in my tiny part of that community here in Tegucigalpa, Honduras.

This time of the year for us is the hardest as we wait for Spring break and the kids (not to mention the teachers) hit academic, relational, behavior, and spiritual points of frustration. Everyone has been reaching the end of themselves, and as hard as that is to watch (and experience) it is SO good because when you get to the end of your patience, the end of your own strength, and the end of yourself, you have no choice but to look to the Lord to carry you through, and that is exactly what He loves to do.
I myself hit a huge wall this week after receiving some hard news from several friends in the states and found my kids to be almost completely unresponsive for two full days, not to mention all the craziness of planning a field trip, family fun day, and an observation lesson….I was definitely at the end of my rope.
Then God led me to Nehemiah (which we are studying this week in Bible). Nehemiah is organizing the remnant of Israelites to rebuild the walls of Jerusalem which are complete rubble. Not only is the work difficult, but then there are surrounding nations that have set out to stop the rebuilding and kill the Israelites.
Nehemiah 4:10 says “The strength of the burden bearers is failing, yet there is much rubbish; and we ourselves are unable to rebuild the wall.”
4:14 (20) – “When I saw their fear, I rose and spoke to the nobles, and officials, and the rest of the people: “Do not be afraid of them; remember the Lord who is great and awesome…Our God will fight for us.”
6: 9 – “They were trying to frighten us, thinking “they will become discouraged with the work and it will not be done.” But now O God, strengthen my hands.
But at last Nehemiah finishes building the wall and 6:16 says – “When all our enemies heard of it, and all the nations surrounding us saw it, they lost their confidence; for they recognized that this work had been accomplished with the help of our God.”

I’m hoping that these verses speak for themselves of how the Lord takes us when we are discouraged, and weak, when our strength is failing and we are afraid that the enemy will get the best of us, that God strengthens us, that He fights for us, and that in the end everyone will “recognize that this work had been accomplished with the help of our God.” -- And this is the ultimate goal anyway, for the Lord to be glorified, and everyone else to recognize that!
So, although it has been a very hard and long week and discouragement has threatened to ruin the work of my hands, “the joy of the Lord is my strength” (Neh. 8:10) and God has been the one doing everything in and through my weakness.
I know I’ve written home dozens of e-mails on this topic, but it continues to ring true and I continue to encourage you to look only to the Lord when your strength is failing, He wants to be glorified more in the work He is completing through us.
On another note, yesterday we went on our first field trip to a blind school to spend time with the kids there and see how they learn and interact and live. When I announced the field trip my class was very upset because we weren’t doing a “fun” field trip or going out to a restaurant to eat. About half of them asked if they could get permission from their parents not to go, and I was upset with them for this attitude. They wrote in their journals that afternoon about what they were thinking this field trip would be like and most of them were just scared.
As I prayed about this I realized that these kids just haven’t been exposed to people different from themselves. This society so isolates people with special needs, that they had just simply not experienced anything like this before.
The next day I took the kids to 4-5 passages in the bible where it talks about Jesus interacting with the blind people, and one specifically in Luke 14 that talk about a master giving a banquet, and when all his friends give excuses for not being able to come Jesus says, “But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, and the blind….” I told the kids that Jesus commands us to count these people as more worthy than our friends, and that by us bringing pizza to these kids and playing with them for a couple hours It is like us “inviting them to a banquet” like Jesus commanded. So we spent time praying for God to change our hearts and attitudes.
But the incredible part of this whole experience is just how greatly God DID change their hearts and their attitudes and used them to really minister to this school of blind kids, which are like the rejects, the outcasts, and the ones that are difficult to love.
The field trip was turning into a disaster because no one would give us details about what we would be doing, or what it would be like, no one was setting it up for us, and every time I called the school it, the director changed the plan. The day before we were scrambling to get everything in order, and I just told the kids that we were going to have to be extremely flexible and trust God to work this all out for us.
He absolutely did, more than we could ask or imagine and I came back exhausted, but so proud of the way my kids showed Jesus to this school. The parents who helped were AMAZING, the kids were more loving and obedient than I have ever seen them before, and we brought so many donations and things to bless this school that they were completely overwhelmed.
I wish I could describe all the pictures I took in my mind, of these dirty, ugly, blind kids, some with their eyes clouded over, others with more disabilities, all with ragged clothes, and smiles on their faces just hanging onto the students from our school. They were laughing and playing and just eating up the attention and love, and after the initial hesitation my kids just jumped right in, without hesitation or boundaries.
We were a blessing, but we also received a HUGE learning experience, and when the kids came back and journaled about their time, they were not scared any more. They had each connected with a specific child, and they had a new understanding of people like this and a love for them. I was just beaming at how outstanding my kids were and how the Lord’s hand was truly over our trip. He is working in and through us, and the moments when it becomes evident are so exciting.

I just passed the 2 page boundary on this letter, so I better stop writing.
Today is family fun day and I volunteered to stand in an area and get water balloons thrown at me for a half an hour….that should be fun. ;) My kids are a little more eager to pelt me than I would like, so we’ll see how that goes.
Thank you for listening (as I always take more of your time than you probably have) and for your continual support and prayers.
I love you guys and know that your prayers carry me through more than I can fathom.
Continue to rely on the joy of the Lord as your strength and watch the Lord do amazing things in and through your weaknesses!

January Post -- Back from Christmas!

2011-08-06T17:48:00.000-07:00

Looking at the last 5 weeks since I’ve been back in Honduras after Christmas has my head spinning! So much has been going on, and it doesn’t stop! I’m wondering if many of you can relate to that feeling, but as we head into this spring season and near spring break, I know that time will fly faster and faster!
So I’ve been taking some moments a day to stop and reflect and enjoy the people and things God has placed in my life at this time. Even if it’s 5 minutes of quiet reflection, it always seems to bring a smile to my face and renew that attitude of thanks that sometimes comes and goes.
So, I don’t even know where to start because there is too much to tell (as you can probably tell from my ramblings already ) But I do want to share with you a few things that God has been doing and thank you for your prayers for me. You are all so faithful.
Teaching has been better since arriving back after break. I know God renewed my heart and mind over Christmas to return and run the race marked out for me with perseverance. Everyday has been strenuous, but then I see God carrying me through all the more. I wish I could put into words the little changes I see in my students, but all I can say is that things are just….better. Instead of 1 good day out of 5, I am getting used to 4 good days out of 5. I’m enjoying teaching more, and finding my kids enjoying it more too. I’m not being met with as much opposition or attitude in the day to day things. We’re working as a team more, and learning how to love each other when it gets tough…..so many life lessons all the time!
So our next class challenge is a chapel presentation that we have to put on. We’ve been planning it for the last month and God has been leading us all along. Today we finally put it all together and I’m getting extremely nervous for how it is going to turn out. I told God that He’s in the business of turning ordinary nothing into extraordinary things for His glory, so He’s going to have to show up big time for this one if He desires glory from what we are seeking to perform….so 7:45am on Friday, please be praying for us as we put our best foot forward and see what God pulls together.
In other areas I’ve been seeing God grant peace and patience and again, just feel renewed each day to press on and enjoy the here and now. My bible study has been encouraging and refreshingly “real”, my friendships have been deepening and I’m finding joy in many relationships here that were more surface level before. Any time that I spend outside of school and in the city is amazing just to be with the people and speak Spanish and enjoy this culture.
Recently I’ve been hitting walls again in regards to how to minister to the poor here. A brief glimpse into these ponderings happened when I was getting on the bus after grocery shopping one morning and a little boy (about 4) came up to the door and just looked through the glass, pleading with his eyes. The bus driver opened the door and gave the boy a left over bottle of coke and the child ran off happy as could be and smiling and waving. I asked the bus driver if he knew the boy and he shook his head, but then he just looked at me and big tears swelled up in his eyes and he started sobbing saying “I grew up just like that boy, that was me!” As I watched his heart reveal itself through the tears, through the compassion, and through the reality of his life I wondered at myself….when was the last time I cried over the orphans on the street corners? When was the last time I stopped to bring joy to a grimy little boy happy with a simple bottle of coke? When was the last time I prayed for the old woman limping along the roadside. When was the last time I opened my eyes to look into the eyes of a man digging through the trash looking for cans and bottles to recycle? I’m living amongst poverty and hardship and yet I’m still an American with blinders on, walking proudly through the streets, it’s so frustrating, and yet so real and I keep looking at Christ’s example while He was here on earth, and I find myself falling miserably short. Pray for me in this, and share with me thoughts and ideas if you can.
As for my church, we are still in the process of finding a new pastor, and it’s taking a long time and becoming a burden to some of the men in the church. It is still going strong, and I definitely still feel called to stay through this season, but I would ask you to also pray for the church as we seek God through this stage and what plans He has in store.
Ok, well, my ramblings have gone on long enough. Just wanted to touch base with you all and thank you again for your faithful support and prayers. I am blessed and hope to encourage you in any way, shape, or form with the words that came out on paper tonight.

Big hugs to all, and make sure to take those moments of reflection each day to stop and see what God is doing and entrust Him with the things that are to come.

November Update

2011-08-06T17:33:00.000-07:00

I write to you looking forward to this coming week of Thanksgiving, excited to share with you the overflowing thanks in my heart for what God has been doing, and what He continues to do.

As I shared a little bit in my last letter home, life here has not been a picnic, it’s been more difficult than I’d like to admit at times. The week of parent teacher conferences was the hardest because I was sick and had so much stress that kept building up, as well as tough stuff going on with kids in my classroom, which I asked you all to pray for.

Since that low point, God has been slowly giving me small successes which were building up to a huge miracle that happened in my classroom this past week.

THANK YOU for praying for me faithfully! In speaking with my mom this past week she passed along messages from many many people asking how I am doing and sharing that everyone has been praying for me. I can’t really express how much I feel these prayers, but I do, and you help me to look to God for each moment of every day and I can feel the extra strength on the hard days. I don’t deserve your faithful love and care, but I am blessed by it.

So, this week started out with a hard day on Monday, I was discouraged yet again. However that afternoon I spoke with a friend online that I had been praying for throughout the past 5 ½ years to come to Christ. I hadn’t talked with her in about a year, so I asked her about where she was spiritually and she said she has just started going to a Christian church….which is an incredible answer to prayer that came completely unexpected after so many prayers for so long. She’s so close to taking that step towards salvation! Tuesday I woke up without motivation and wishing the week would just hurry up and get over.

I came to my Heavenly Father and told Him I was tired, inadequate, and feeling like a failure.

He brought me to Psalm 121—which armed me with words that I needed to step into the day ahead with confidence that my Jesus was walking with me, and that He wouldn’t let me stumble or fall. I wrote in my journal, “Felt God wrap His arms around me today in a real way.”

Wednesday morning I decided to share with my kids about the prayers God had answered with my friend during devotion time at school. God led the discussion and opened up their hearts like never before. I talked about how God can change relationships, He can change hearts, and He can change lives and habits of sin…but sometimes we have to pray with faith for a long time before God answers….in my case over 5 ½ years. The kids caught on quickly and shared about parents who weren’t getting along, or father’s that were smoking, and a few other tough situations the kids were dealing with….reminding me that it’s not about what I’m teaching the kids academically, it’s about what I can help them understand spiritually, and they embraced it wholeheartedly.

Thursday morning started out normal. I have to get on my knees every morning and claim the Lord’s strength and power over my job, because I honestly can’t do any of it on my own, and if I do it is a disaster!

During devotions Thursday morning my two boys that have been trouble all year got into a fight, it was too big this time to overlook, and the whole class was involved. So I stopped everything and said, “lets talk about this, we can’t go on like this. Something needs to change. What do we need to do to help each other get along.”

We stepped into a huge discussion. ALL the kids were participating, trying to help the two boys get along, and work together as a whole class. There were many tears on the part of Josué, and the kids were surprisingly mature in so many of their ideas of how to get along. I refused to “separate” the boys from one another always.

So the discussion went on for about 25 minutes, it came to the point where I was reminding the kids that we couldn’t love one another on our own, we could only do it with Christ’s love through us and they brought up two key things I had been teaching them in devotions.

1.) Extra grace required people – people we just need to extend extra grace to in order to live and dwell in unity within a community.

2.) Prayer for God to change the relationship

The KIDS reminded me of what I taught them yesterday and so we decided to pray. The kids stretched out their hands towards Roy and Josué and began praying over them, praying for their relationship, praying for us as a class to love one another and encourage one another.

The Spirit of God was definitely in the midst of us, I could feel it through the whole discussion, through the way the kids expressed the truth to one another, and how they decided all together that they needed to love one another, extend grace, and pray for one another.

At the end of about a 20 minute prayer session I prayed and then we had a big “group hug.”

Then the kids had Spanish class, and then PE class. When they came back from PE the teacher said, “Roy and Josué were talking to one another today!” I was really surprised, but decided to keep my eye on them. During Math, not an unkind word was said between them, and at lunch time Josué pulled his chair up to Roy’s desk to eat lunch with him. They were talking and laughing together and the whole class was freaking out watching them.

We realized right then and there that God had done an incredible miracle. The kids said, “God answered our prayers and we didn’t even have to wait!”

THEN, at recess later that day, my class organized themselves into two teams and played kickball all together with no help. They came back and said, “Miss Nyhoff, we feel like a class today.”

I was so proud of them and couldn’t stop thanking the Lord for His mercies, greater than I could ask or imagine.

As my mom said, “Those are the days you live for and pray for.”

I’m still treasuring this in my heart, realizing that God is truly at work in hearts, in lives, and He is using me with this group of kids.

So, that was a long story, sorry to draw it out so long winded, but I wanted you to get the full picture of what God has done.

I am claiming that Josué and Roy’s good relationship will continue, that through God’s power their attitudes have changed towards one another, and that they will not return to their old ways of treating one another. ONLY by God’s power over our classroom.

I have the opportunity to share tomorrow morning at teacher devotions about some of these answers to prayer and I’m a little nervous. Will you say a prayer for me when you get this, that I would be courageous in encouraging the other teachers to pray and take leaps of faith, and watch God work?

This Thanksgiving I’m headed down south to Nicaragua to spend the short 3 day break with my old partners in ministry and beloved friends in Managua.

I’m still praying about what this time will look like and how to spend the short time with everyone, as well as dealing with the stress of traveling 7-8 hours by bus to get there. But I’m excited to take another step with those relationships.

Please pray for guidance and protection.

When I come back we will jump into the Christmas season and have 3 short and crazy weeks before I am home for Christmas!

I can’t believe how the time has flown by, but also how God has been working so much in relationships, in the time He gives me for each day, and in the strength He gives when I am weak.

Thanking God for EACH of you as you are a huge part of what keeps me going here, and the support that I need.

I miss you, I love you, and I’m already beginning to pray about time over Christmas and how God is going to orchestrate time with each of you.

October Update

2011-08-06T17:23:00.000-07:00

I decided it was time for another update, now that we are almost through October and fall is in “full swing.” Anyone I talk to is feeling busy, maybe stressed, and that “mid Semester hump” that we have to get through. This week was the end of the 1st quarter. It’s hard to believe we have been in school for 44 days! Wow, and I’ve been out of the country for almost 3 months!

I feel myself missing fall a lot while I am here. I miss the trees changing colors, the crisp fall weather, the apple cider and pumpkins, corn mazes and the coming of winter….ah, please enjoy it for me!

Here the weather has been constantly changing. Last week it rained all week, almost nonstop. This week it has been windy and cold and the sun has only come out for a little while….not the “fall” I was envisioning.

In September I had a few hard weeks right in a row, feeling the reality of this first year had blown me over. I have been in a good place though recently, realizing my complete insufficiency to do anything on my own and having to constantly rely on the Lord for wisdom and insight moment by moment. I have been spending a lot of time in prayer, and that aspect is yielding fruit and keeping me going, though the days are hard and long.

I adore my kids, I love greeting them every morning and finding funny things to laugh about throughout the day to make school fun, but I can’t hide from the reality of this being my first year of teaching. I have such high goals and aspirations of the kind of teacher I want to be, and yet the day to day reality of everything holds me back in so many respects. I fail daily, I struggle because my kids think school is “boring” (a word we are no longer aloud to use) and I have a few kiddos that are shaping up for a long journey in learning to love and serve one another this year.

God has been so faithful to me as I walk this road seemingly “alone” in the struggles and has ALWAYS sent what I need. My principle has been extremely supportive and sat through multiple parent meetings with me this past couple of weeks, listening and defending me and the school. My respect for him is growing with each interaction.

So as I teach, sometimes I wonder who is learning more, me, or the students? All I know is that I’m learning “un montón” every day, but it is clear that God is faithful, He has equipped me for the work of my hands, and He is carrying me through, especially on the hard days when I have to run to Him because I feel like such a failure.

I guess it’s time for me to ask for some prayer with some of my tough students. I definitely need some help in dealing with them and loving them, so 3 specific students are:

1.) Roy is my class bully – comes from a rough family situation and it shows

2.) Josué is the hard one for people to love – very annoying at times, even to me

3.) Andrés has yet to learn the power of his words and attacks people with them, as well as being the class clown and always wanting the attention.

These three are in constant “war” with each other and pester each other incessantly.

Please pray over my classroom environment and for these boys hearts, and for wisdom in each moment as I struggle to do what is “right” in leading and guiding them. I also need new ideas and strength as I know this is just the beginning in our journey together.

2nd I would ask for your prayers for parent teacher conferences next week. I am getting a little nervous for them as some parents are quite intense when it comes to their children, school, and grades. Please pray for wisdom, a guarded heart to take what they say with understanding and a listening ear, and to know how to encourage the parents in how they are raising their kids, but be able to give constructive criticism on the other hand.

Apart from school, I have been finding many outlets and enjoying different aspects of this culture and country. 3 weeks ago another teacher and I went to do a teacher training for a small neighborhood school in one of the poorest parts of town. The teachers are volunteers and right out of high school, but they have beautiful hearts to serve the kids. This was an awesome opportunity because God has already given me so many resources in this area after the 8 months in Nicaragua. We’re hoping to make a commitment to training the teachers at least twice a month and God is adding to our number teachers from school here who are willing to help, which is very exciting! Please pray for this little school and our relationship with the teachers.

Two weekends ago I went to the southern coast of Honduras to a island called Amapala with 3 other teachers. It was a grand adventure to get out on our own and spend some time on the beach, and interact with people in a different setting. We traveled by every sort of public transportation available (7 hours with a cost of $6 to get there) and on the way back we hitched a ride in the back of a truck! I attached a picture for you to get a glimpse into our adventure -- it was beautiful!

This weekend I went on a women’s retreat with my church to a retreat center about an hour outside of the city. It was a great time of getting to know the women, worshipping together, and again...sharing many adventures! We had a bonfire on Saturday night and the Spirit of God was greatly received and it was a neat time of sharing and prayer and surrender. Afterwards we roasted marshmallows…which NONE of the women had ever done before! (They call marshmallows “besitos” here – which means little kisses!:)

It was so fun watching all these women like little kids crowded around the fire with sticks of marshmallows. I attached a group picture for you to see.

After this weekend I am feeling much at home in this church family, and God is confirming that this is where I am supposed to stay and serve.

Ah, there is so so much to share, that I just don’t know where to begin and end.

God has been working in my heart and mind in many many ways, but again just showing me that He is faithful when I am obedient and surrendered to Him. I can do nothing on my own. I want to testify again to the power of prayer, and encourage each one of you to pray more, specifically for anything and everything. God directs us moment by moment as we tune our hearts to His voice and gentle leading. Don’t miss out on anything He has to show you and tell you in a day.

So brothers and sisters, I must not bore you any longer. Thank you for reading about my life and journey, but more specifically for praying for me and supporting me. I have felt your prayers, and needed your support as I continue to seek my place here and wait on the Lord to reveal relationships that He desires to bless and grow. I do miss home very much, y tengo mucho falta de cada uno de ustedes (I feel the lack of each and every one of you in my life here!) I pray God’s hand of faithfulness and joy over each of your lives and hope to hear anything and everything from you when you get moments to share.

Filled with the graciousness of El Señor,

Honduras...first days as a teacher!

2010-09-04T11:52:00.000-07:00

Buenos Dias de Honduras y que El Señor les beniga!
Oh how many joys I have to tell you of God’s faithfulness and beauty seen in this place!
I have officially survived the first full day of school, Thursday and Friday of last week being half days, so it is very exciting to be at this point and to look forward to so many good things!
It was quite a push to get the classroom ready for the first day of school and I spent many days working late into the night. Everything takes more time here, so I had to keep reminding myself of that so I wouldn’t get frustrated. Between power outages and waiting for books and supplies to arrive and meeting after meeting repeating much of the same information, it became a task to keep the focus on the Lord and not get wrapped up in the struggle to get everything done. We learned in one of our cultural seminars this past week that you need 3 things(these are just the top 3) to adapt well to a new culture:
1. Sense of humor
2. Ability to fail
3. Adaptability
I have definitely been understanding these 3 things on a whole new level, and it has been a good stretch! Needless to say, God has been filling in all the gaps and providing in the places where I have fallen short.
On my first day of school I was so nervous I thought I was going to throw up, but the minute I saw the smiling faces of the kids I knew everything was going to be fine!
We are now learning each other’s sense of humors and building our classroom environment, and things are going well! I’m definitely making a lot of mistakes, but they say here “Se vale equivocarse” – there’s value in making mistakes! I know God has specifically picked this class to help me and understand me through my first year of teaching. As you can see from the pictures…they are precious!

Apart from school(although there hasn’t been much else) – I am building good relationships with my roommates and I enjoy coming home to them each day. I have a small group which I know will be a blessing this year as I transition – it will be so good to have support through everything.

I LOVE my partner teacher Gina, and Stacy brings a lot of life and passion to our 5th grade team, so all three of us are new to teaching 5th grade, however by God’s grace we are feeling equipped and excited about working together this year. (*please pray specifically for these relationships as we truly need each other to make the best learning experience for the kids)

I have tried out 2 more churches and am still seeking out a church to call home, it may take a while to find, so I am trying to be patient and yet not get discouraged. I definitely miss my amazing church family on Sunday mornings!
(*Please pray God will specifically lead me to a church and plant me there to expand my ministry outside of the school and that it wouldn’t take too much longer to settle in to a place.)

I feel as if I am still in the “honeymoon” stage of this whole experience, even though I have been working so hard, everything is new and wonderful. (*Please pray that I will continue to keep the same attitude as the semester moves forward and things get harder)

In all, please join me in praising the Lord for the ministry He has given me here, the way He is equipping me, and the joy He is pouring over me as I serve Him.
Much love to all of you and a big hug!

Honduras...coming soon!

2010-07-18T11:36:00.000-07:00

Hey all...

I'm excited to be back on my blog and focused on heading out on a new adventure. It seems like the past few months have flown by and the time for my departure is growing ever closer.

I know God has called me specifically to Honduras, based on many confirmations and the desires of my heart He is fulfilling in this next step.
I cannot WAIT to be a teacher for the first time, to learn more spanish, to fall in love with a whole new group of people in a culture that has already claimed my heart, and to grow as God breaks and shapes and moves in the way He does, for His kindom purposes and His glory.
My greatest prayer is for God to use me to share my passion and love for Him with the students in my classroom. I desire for them to know God more and more each day as we learn and grow together in the classroom, through each unit of study, and as we see Him at work all around us.
Some other prayer needs specified for you all are below:
- travel and safety
- wisdom in 1st classroom teaching experience
- Pray for each of my students in 5th grade and that I would give them a passion for learning, and most of all, God’s Word.
- provision of a community of believers and Spanish speaking church
- pray against sickness
- growth in Spanish speaking skills and courage to use it
- confident- humility as I step into everything new
- blessing upon my relationships with my partner teachers, school staff, roommates, parents and students!
- That I would hold to the truth and promises of God and seek Him day by day to know Him more and more and find strength in my weakness.
- joy in the journey God has set before me and the privelege of serving Him in what He has called me to do.
- I have set the LORD continually before me. Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore, my heart is glad and my glory rejoices, my flesh also will dwell securely. -Psalm 16:8-9

* Thank you for going on this adventure with me, for loving me and supporting me, for giving me confidence in what God has called me to do, and for blessing me with your prayers -- those I need most of all.
*I say goodbye with great sadness and pain in my heart, for it is hard to be apart. But I know that God is opening a door for new relationships and blessings as I step out in faith. I love you all dearly, please know that.

Thanksgiving -- Accion de Gracias

2008-12-06T21:09:00.000-08:00

Treasured moments of the week of Thanksgiving that I would like to share with you:

1. This weekend I participated in my first Nicaraguan birthday party! I walked in to the small yard joining a tiny house surrounded by pieces of tin roofing and discarded boards for fencing carrying a large cake, 22 cupcakes, and a bag of candy to share. To my surprise there were over 70 people there and the hugest piñata I have ever seen dangling from a nearby tree. Everyone was dressed in their best clothes and watching the 3 year old birthday boy scream in fear of the 5 foot piñata and try to run away from his mother who desperately wanted just one picture of him with the piñata. This family has adopted me into theirs and was so sweet to let me share with their family in celebration and acceptance. I felt loved and learned a lot about this culture!
2. After a long and stressfull day the 5th graders were practicing for their Thanksgiving program and I was imitating what not to do when standing on stage, the kids thought my impression of a 1st grader waving at his mother was hysterical and after a few moments we were all laughing so hard we couldn’t stop for a few minutes, many with tears rolling down their faces. One of my favorite moments of teaching so far!
3. One night this week a family from church invited all the teachers over for a thanksgiving meal they had prepared for us. We got to meet some new faces of missionaries that have served here for years and years and hear of their stories of God’s faithfulness accompanied by soft candlelight and the best turkey I have ever had! (Turkey’s here cost around $100, and so is quite a delicacy!)
4. Wednesday morning was the Thanksgiving program and it was so neat to see all my 5th graders yelling at the top of their lungs with beaming faces: “It is good to give thanks to the Lord, to sing praises to Your name, Oh Most High. To declare your lovingkindness in the morning, and your faithfulness every night!” ~Psalm 92:2~
5. My roommate and I took the leap of faith and decided to meet a friend of a friend at the Managua airport so that he could take us 4 ½ hours up north to an orphanage in the mountainous regions of Nicaragua. It was obvious after about 5 minutes of conversation that he(Alvero is his name!) did not know the Lord, but after 4 ½ + hours in the car we had ample time to plant seeds into very soft and fertile soil! His questions were rich with desire to know and understand the true, living, and active God, Yahweh!
6. Thanksgiving morning we awoke to a temperature of about 55 degrees, it felt so good to be under covers! We knew we were just where we needed to be for this Thanksgiving day, and we had no idea the blessing He had in store! We took picture after picture of the refreshing beauty surrounding us. God used this time to restore my soul in many ways and reveal to me sin that I had slipped into. I was able to confess this before the Lord and pray for these precious children, it was precious time.
7. We got to hike with the kids up a mountain behind the orphanage (about a 45 minute hike) with picnic lunches awaiting at the top! One precious little girl had shoes that were way too small for her feet, so after about 8 minutes of walking she was crying. I carried her much of the way up and back and we got to sing a lot of songs, such as: “Yo tengo….gozo,gozo,gozo, gozo en mi corazon…donde? En mi Corazon! Yo tengo gozo, gozo, gozo, gozo, en mi Corazon…..porque Cristo me salvo!” We truly were filled with joy as we ascended that beautiful mountain and looked over the lakes and scenery while munching on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches at the top!
8. The kids had all been especially good all day, knowing that this was one of two days in the whole year in which they could eat as much food as they wanted. We had peeled 30 pounds of potatoes, carried “crunchy cebollos (onions)” all the way from the states for the green bean casserole, and purchased a gigantic turkey, the feast was ready! The kids and adults gathered together and shared one or two things that they wanted to thank the Lord for the in the year, among many praises for “Jesus loving me” and “Jesus providing everything for me” one of the interns, who just happened to be German, piped up and shared that he was thankful he got to have his first ever thanksgiving holiday!(Ironic that he had to come to Nicaragua to experience an American holiday J)
9. Many sweet children touched my heart over the 41 hours I spent in that mountain orphanage, it definitely is a place I could feel comfortable living in for the rest of my life! The kids were incredible. We took a few kids back down to Managua with us, but we had to pack them in the car with us. One little boy, Josecito, sat on my lap for an entire 5 ½ hours in perfect contentment, talking to me in his little sweet voice, playing with my hair, and sleeping in my arms. His favorite song to sing me was in English and went like this: “lullaby and goodnight….I hope all your dreams come true.” What a precious child of God I got to hold in my arms for so many hours and pray blessing over blessing upon.

I guess I will leave you with 9 not-so-short snap shots. God worked out so many details in my roommate and I being able to spend Thanksgiving in a little mountain town called Jinotega. I want to tell you about two of the girls that stole my heart! One is 14, cares for all the children as a mother, and reminded me of my sweet little sister Sarah in a lot of ways. She wrote me a note when I left which said, “Julia, we are friends forever. Remember you are special to God and to me. I miss you already. Don’t forget me. Tu hermanita, Nora” She was a shining star, a bright and beautiful presence in this place. God must have wonderful plans for her, and oh how I pray He continues to grow her up in the ways of the Lord to be obedient and humbly serve Him.
The other girl was a 6 year old that definitely was attached to my hip from the moment we stumbled into each other brushing our teeth at 6:10 in the morning. She was shy, but stunning. She was the one I carried up the mountain. Her name is Luz, and as I was saying goodbye she whispered, “Julia, te quiero muchchuchuchuchisisisisisisimo!” (I love you a lot lot lot lot lot!)
I found out her story on the way home and my heart broke. She came to the orphanage a little less than 2 months ago and they had found her in a cardboard box house where she was living with her father. He had been sexually abusing her since she was 4.
Just one day and my heart is attached, not even intentionally (in fact, I know that I easily give pieces of my heart away to children such as these at orphanages in different places, so I usually am guarded) But, never did I expect the incredibly unconditional love and shining presence of Jesus to grab my heart in such a way in this place, oh how blessed I was to get to spend this Thanksgiving with these beautiful children. I know I was put in their lives to share their stories as many may pray for them for years to come. Many of their stories are just as heartbreaking as Lucita’s.

La Chureca

2008-11-08T20:15:00.000-08:00

I've had an incredible week of seeing God answer prayers. I'll take this minute to thank each one of you for your prayers, please do not grow weary of them, they are hugely impactful in my life and in this place. I have been praying for weeks, months actually, since April, to visit the largest trash dump in Central America, named La Chureca. It is about a 15 minute drive from my apartment and God had obviously orchestrated circumstances and opportunities in my life over the summer so as I could not avoid the knowledge of this place in Managua. But months and even years of praying could not have begun to prepare my heart for the site I would behold in the reality of this place. I will start at the beginning.....a very good place to start.

Jesenia, the gal I put on my prayer list last week, the sweet lady who so faithfully and passionately ministered to my heart during this time here in Nicaragua.... she works with a ministry called Love, Light and Melody. They work alongside the leader of a band stationed in Denver called Braddigan (Brad broke away from the band Dispatch). Brad has turned his singing career into a ministry in which he comes down to La Chureca several times a year, works with specific families in the dump, and builds relationships. Then he takes stories, pictures, and film back to the states and uses his concerts as benefits for these families, but also giving people knowledge about this place and about the need here. I had e-mailed Brad after seeing a documentary film he did, back in April and the trash dump had been on my heart and mind ever since. After several more random encounters with people who had ministered at the trash dump I began to wonder what God had in store, I was beginning to see a pattern.

When school was canceled on Friday becuase of the Nicaraguan elections this weekend I began praying for an opportunity to visit la chureca with the extra time I had during the day. I struggle with praying so much and then wondering if I should wait for the Lord to answer my prayers, or for me just to plunge ahead in pursuit of the prayer. At about 10 am I had spent a lot of time with the Lord that morning and continued to pray for God's will for the day, whatever that may be. I felt the need to call Jesenia, though I had only had about a 1/2 hour conversation with her one time I decided to brave the awkwardness and my lack of spanish speaking skills....and I called. She was so excited that I had called and said she could take me to la chureca if I could meet her at 2pm at Siete Sur.....I hung up the phone and began freaking out that I had agreed to random things because I don't speak spanish very well and understanding over the phone is difficult! Did she say 12 0' clock or 2 0' clock? Where is Siete Sur? How am I going to get there? What if she had said tomorrow, not today? I had to pray and tell God that this was in His hands and control, not mine....then I decided to propose an adventure to my roommate....she quickly agreed to embark with me and we set out together, unknowing of what we would do or if we would even find Jesenia. God knew.

A wonderful taxi driver stopped, though we couldn't pay him the full amount because we only had american dollars, he still took us directly to Siete Sur, and we walked a couple blocks to the bank....Jesenia showed up 5 minutes early and we then set out for the first time on the bus system....it is NUTS! Crammed, all the guys yelling at you because you are blond, homeless people asking you for money.....quite the experience! Jesenia was a peaceful presence and just calmly showed us how to get about. The bus dropped us off in a random neighborhood and we walked down a street to find ourselves looking out over La Chureca. "Comenza la chureca," Jesenia said as a horrible stench began to descend upon us. Fly's everywhere, burning fires....cows and horses roaming amidst dogs and people in piles upon piles of trash for miles and miles. Men were hacking at the hug rib cages or cows, stripping any left over meat from the bones. Sometimes the smoke was so thick you could barely see in front of you where you were walking. Mud, human waste, and trash sloshed around our feet as we walked into the trash dump. It is a sight that reached past my eyes and struck my heart. It is something I will never forget.

As Jesenia introduced us to two families and many children that came up to jump into her arms I looked into the eyes of these people and loved them. I don't know how people can be so hardened by an environment such as this and still be soft enough for love to shine in their eyes. Living day in and day out amidst trash, searching for their livelyhood amidst the garabage the rest of the world discards....have we discarded these people as well?

The most interesting part of this whole experience I think was not as much the sweet embraces and dirty smiles...not the overwhelming mountains of trash, or the disgust of living, moving and breathing amidst such a place...but it was as we were saying our goodbyes to one of the sweet families, we turned to see a large school/tour bus making it's way down the "road," kicking up mud as the tires tread the trash. A group of American's were inside, white faces, staring out the windows at the people they passed, pressing camara's to the glass and flashing pictures. Their eyes showed terror...not love. Their camara's flashed messages of judgment, not acceptance. I do not know what this group was doing, or why they were driving through the dump. I am sure God had called many of them to serve for a time in the dump and to share hugs and embraces and take home stories and pictures to the states....but for me, standing with the people and watching this occur hurt my heart. It made me look at our American way of life with such disgust. We know nothing of the ways of Jesus and how he served us.....

Philippians 2: 5-11

"5Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: 6Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, 7but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross! 9Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father."

My heart cried out with a longing to serve these people humbly, becoming like them, obedient to death of the old way of life.

I don't know what God started doing in me as I stood in that trash dump....but it is something gripping my soul, squeezing my insides, pleading with my mind, drumming on my heart.

We will see what God has in store. For now brothers and sisters, join me in prayer, join me in humility, join me in obedience to our Lord and Savior Christ Jesus as a response to a glimpse into the lives of these people, God's children, living souls worthy of some uncomfortable feelings and some ponderings of the soul in the way that you live and serve where you are at. May your attitude be the same as that of Christ Jesus.

Here is the Love, Light, and Melody Website if you would like a greater glimpse of this ministry: http://lovelightandmelody.org/home.php

Oh Culture!

2008-11-07T07:07:00.000-08:00

Here are some of the cultural differences I am beginning to embrace here in Nicaragua:

1. Lizards run all over the house, they are harmless, but they "bark" or "squeak" loudly when talking to one another.
2. There is no hot water anywhere, only one nob on all faucets, including showers......cold!
3. When walking down the street for about a 10 minute period it is likely that a blond american girl will get whistled at, cat calls, and other forms of yelling out the window of cars about....18 times. (I counted)
4. There are no street signs and directions are given by land marks and rotundas.
5. Most Nicaraguans cannot pronounce the name Nyhoff, so they just call me "Miss! Miss!" and the closest spelling one of the students has attempted looks like this: Ninehawlf
6. Fruit baskets are the highest honor of gifts to give and recieve in social situations
7. Trash is burned anywhere and everywhere you go....there is always the smell of burning trash in the air (It makes me laugh at the people who are afraid about the American atmosphere, you should try coming to third world countries)
8. School can be canceled by the government, then switched back, then declared a national holiday the day before....this makes for difficult planning, but nice days off!
9. I have so many mosquito bites I look like I have chicken pox everyday...and feel like it too!
10. Nica time is SLOW, everything runs at least 30-70 minutes behind schedule all the time!
11. A swarm of ants will attack a piece of food dropped on the counter or floor in approximately 38 seconds
12. I have never sweat so much in my life and have yet to wear a long sleeve shirt or any kind of jacket! I knew I would love this country! :)

13. Rice and Beans(name: gallopinto) is eaten for every meal: lunch, dinner, and especially breakfast!

Be joyful always.....

2008-11-02T11:35:00.001-08:00

Here is a quote from Amy Charmichael that I want to share with you, so inspiring!

"Too few Christians live radiantly, beautifully, abundantly. We do not rise to the level of the joys that are ftting of God's heirs. There are far deeper joys within our reach than we have experienced. The beauty of the Lord does not shine always in our faces and glow in our characters and apear in our dispositions and tempers. The trouble with us is that we've been trying only the shallows of God's love. We must cut the last chain that binds us back to the shoare of this world, and like Columbus, put out to sea to discover new worlds of blessing."

One month mark...assailed by hardships, but not overcome

2008-11-02T11:21:00.000-08:00

It seems like it has been forever since my last update two weeks ago. Teaching has picked up at a rapid pace and suddenly I find my free time diminishing as lesson plans consume much of my mind and time. This past week was very difficult for me, yet filled with huge blessings at the same time. I am learning many things and count it a privilege to be able to share some of the things God puts on my heart with you so candidly. Hang with me, this could get long. J
Here is a journal entry that will help get me started,
Gracias a Dios,
Oh that every breath would be an exhale of thanksgiving, that every inhale be prefaced with praise – “Let everything that has breath praise the Lord.” The Psalms leave us with this grand command and how many breaths do I waste in praise to myself, or mutterings of discontentment, or sighs of complaint. Lord, “Let every breath, all that I am, never cease to worship you!” “Tune my heart to sing your praise.” “May the words of my mouth and the meditations of my heart be pleasing to you O God, my Rock and my Redeemer.”

Honestly, I have been broken this week. The message God seems to be continually speaking over me is humility and meekness. How I fail at these two things. When God brings about things to put me in a place of humiliation I revert to complaining and discontentment. I see through myself so clearly here. There is nothing to hide behind here, no retreat. I continually am reminded that I am nothing, that I am sinful, prideful, selfish, and the only good thing in me is Christ. But when I see my faults and shortcomings so much I fall back on the magnified name of my Lord. Oh how strong He is in my weakness! Though it is painful, I would desire no other thing than for me to be a broken pot. Jeremiah 18: 1-6 says,
This is the word of the Lord that came to Jeremiah, “Go down to the potter’s house and there I will give you my message.” So I went down to the potter’s house, and I saw him working at the wheel. But the pot he was shaping was mared in his hands; so the potter formed it into another pot, shaping it as seemed best to him. Then the word of the Lord came to me, “O House of Israel, can I not do with you what this potter does?” Declares the Lord, “Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in My hands.”
God is making something new out of me, the mared and broken pot.
This week I struggled continually with teaching. Again, my pride brought me low to humiliation. I think that I know how to do many of these things and have the natural ability and talent to teach, but this week of teaching definitely stretched me more than ever before. Ultimately, I failed at teaching my students anything this week. I got a lot of feedback from the principal and my partner teacher. Hours of conversation on how I could do better, what I need to change…..it was exhausting….questions whirring in my mind…. “am I doing anything right?” My immediate unspoken response, “I hate this, I can’t do anything right, I want to give up. Why do I hate this so much?” I came home Friday afternoon with piles of planning to have done by Monday, almost in tears at the aweful week I had just had and the weekend of work ahead after just another lecture on what I needed to do to be a better teacher.
Oh Beloved, when you are weak, then I am strong. Boast all the more in your weakness so that I may be evident in MY strength over your weakness. God’s voice sang over me as I slept Friday night and I awoke Saturday morning with new motivation, ideas and passion to do the best I could in this situation. Oh how God is close to the humble in heart.

I share all this with you as I lead into this next part, so hang with me.
Throughout this process of molding there has been an even clearer theme I see in scripture I read, conversations I have, or prayers I pray…..Thanksgiving.
As you can see from my journal entry, thanksgiving has become an ever present process and I have been overwhelmed with the results of the breathing in and out of thanksgiving. I had the privilege of joining in a Thanksgiving celebration with the ministry I will be involved with in January. Yes, the date was set 3 weeks early so that everyone could be a part of the gathering as many travel to different places in Nicaragua over this holiday. They so kindly invited me, and I couldn’t wait to meet everyone. Let me tell you, it is truly a family and I am so excited to be a part of this group of believers. We spent most of the evening (about 3 hours) talking and sharing God’s faithfulness and blessing over the past year. Every eye had tears at different points. The director of this ministry shared about thank offerings in the bible and celebrations God’s people had regularly to remember what He had so graciously done for them. Celebrations of God’s faithfulness are so important, and we need to be more serious about our thank offerings not only once a year, but celebrating all the time! A heart of thankfulness is often transformed into praise and praise into transformation of attitude and heart towards things eternal.
The next night I met a wonderful lady at a gathering I was at. She spoke only Spanish….perfect opportunity for me to practice! J We had a little bit of a hard time communicating at first, but you could tell our hearts were connected in the Lord. After some introduction conversation she asked me right off, “What is God teaching you?” I shared everything I could put into words in spanish and she understood. She then went on a 15 minute Spirit led speech about how I need to be using this time in adoration. I understood every word that she said because God knew I needed to hear those words, whether in Spanish or English. Tears came, oh how sinful I have been in not continually turning to Christ in adoration, praise and thanksgiving for not only the blessings and good things, but the hardships, trials, and pain. “Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thes. 5:16-18)
I am not doing these lessons justice in simple words, but I pray that you can hear my heart speak to yours. Oh that we filled our speech, worship, prayer, and every movement with more thanksgiving…how our light would shine in the darkness. Prepare your hearts for the Thanksgiving holiday with a daily, heartfelt, attitude of thanksgiving in the next few weeks. Not only turning to him in thanks for the blessings, but for everything.

“We always carry around in our bodies the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that His life may be revealed in our mortal bodies.” ~ 2 Cor. 4:10-11

It's Raining, it's pouring....

2008-10-17T14:56:00.000-07:00

It has been quite a day! For the past 52 hours it has been raining, pretty much non-stop. When it rains here, I must clarify, it is not simply a light drizzle, or a soft afternoon rain shower...it POURS! Sheets of rain thumping the ground with a deafening thunder. One of the 5th grade boys had a prayer request on Monday for a hurricane moving toward Honduras. As I was praying it came to mind that I now live in a country not half way around the world from Honduras, but next door. Thus, we are feeling the waves of the hurricane here. One of the fifth grade parents came in to the classroom after school today and helped us move bookshelves and supplies out of the way of numerous leaks in the classroom. The space around my desk is not a puddle. She said, "I am 43 years old and I have never seen rain like this before in my country!"

Apparently, it only rains this much for this long about once every 4-5 years.

Welcome to Nicaragua Julie. :)

I woke up this morning and caught a glimpse of a piece of sky. Immediately I went outside to walk around while there was a break in the storm. It was a gorgeous morning and I prayed that God would hold off the rains for today as many homes have been ruined, streets flooded, and crops destroyed. God had no such plans. I taught the kids about El Roi, the God who sees in devotions this week, so we prayed that God would see each person effected by the rain and protect them.

The power went off at three different times today....our "hallways" were rivers, of which we had to set boards to divert the streams of water so we could walk to the cafetin and chapel and other classes.....at some points in the day the rain was so loud that I had to yell for the kids to be able to hear me....by noon, everyone was SOAKED to the bone.... no one wanted to focus on school and learning....it was one of my most favorite days in Nicaragua so far!

It is such a neat experience being here. No amount of rain could make me dislike even one day. This is the day that the LORD has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it!

On the other hand, please join me in praying for all the people who are NOT as blessed with houses to shelter them from the rain, or may have lost everything to the flooding of their homes, or their crops. Also pray for Honduras, as I hear it got hit pretty hard by this storm.

Renewed

2008-10-17T14:51:00.000-07:00

It has been a hard week. Originally, when I sat down to try to summarize this week I wanted to share about culture shock and loneliness. But as I asked the Lord what He wanted me to share, these things came to mind in which I found myself on my knees in repentance, crying out to the Lord, “Yes Lord, I believe, help me in my unbelief!” The biggest culture shock for me has been going from a life that runs 150 miles per hour a day with not even a moment of time to spare, or a chance to think and reflect, a life of constant busyness and nonstop activity…. to a place where I am completely set apart with a new beginning, no friends, hardly any communication, no worldly distractions, and hours of which I can fill doing anything! My mind is having a hard time even processing the reality of this because it is so far from what I have known for many many years.
For the past couple of days I have struggled with the daily living out of this situation God has placed me in. I have even gone as far as to feel sorry for myself as I sit in a tiny room, all by myself without a way to communicate with the ones I love and void of human embrace for over a week now, which could seem like a lifetime. Yes, I admit that these are the thoughts that have mostly occupied my mind for the past days.
Tonight, however, God has revealed to me the truth. I cried out to Him in repentance saying, “Lord, I believe you have called me to this place, for such a time as this….yet help me in my unbelief!”
Then belief came swooping in to cover me with its wings of hope. ”Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” (2 Cor. 4:16-18)
Who am I to complain? Who am I to mope about the extra and much needed time I get to spend with my Savior and Best Friend? Who am I to allow myself to pity myself for such set apartness? I am nothing, I am a dumb sheep in desperate need of a Shepherd. (Jehovah Raah is the Lord our Shepherd who I taught the kids about in bible this week.) The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul. (Psalm 23)
Thus I have come to an acceptance and a place of praise as I realize my Shepherd is leading me through a process of restoring my soul to a place where I have no want for anything else but His presence alone to satisfy the desires of my heart. What a beautiful place for my soul to rest in. What a gracious gift of forgiveness and faith. Thank you oh Lord my Rock and my Refuge, I hide myself in Thee.

Great first fin de Semana

2008-10-10T14:39:00.000-07:00

Today was my first Sunday in Nicaragua and it was beautiful. I was blessed to be able to attend the American church that is right here at the school. The whole service is in English and over 100 Americans and Nicaraguans meet to praise the Lord together! The fellowship was amazing. Thankfully I had met 4-5 of the women at the church at a women’s tea the day before and they greeted me with hugs and smiles. At the “welcome time” I had to stand up and introduce myself, and afterwards two couples came up to introduce themselves to me because I will be working with their ministry in January. One of the couples has a daughter in my 5th grade class! Isn’t God amazing? :) It was incredible to see the community between dozens of missionary families from many different ministries praying for one another and encouraging one another. I’m coming to find that this community is pretty much a norm in this city between Christians because many prayers have been prayed for many years for unity and blessing upon this city. God is doing incredible things and I am just glimpsing parts and pieces in these first couple of days. I am so excited to share with you as I uncover more and more of what God is doing here and how He is going to work through me. I am so blessed to be joining Him at the work He is already doing here! It is huge!
Next week I pray to have the opportunity to go to what I hear is a wonderful Spanish speaking church that many of the missionaries work with.
I am actually not getting much Spanish practice as most of the teachers only speak English fluently and my roommates only speak English, so now my prayer is to get more challenging Spanish practice…haha, never thought I would be asking that! God is providing in every way!
*Random note: my roommate found us a new house pet….His name is Ralph and he is an elephant beetle I almost stepped on. He is about 5 inches long and has VERY pokey legs. He escaped in our apartment one night and after searching for him we gave up, thinking he had cleared the premise, but then we found him the next night, stuck on his back in the middle of our kitchen, legs flailing. We were happy to have our pet back. He is now alive and well. :) oh the adventures!

***I can only get on my blog on the weekends at this point, so I wrote this last week and was not able to get on till today, so don’t mind the date, the information is in consecutive order.

I've arrived!

2008-10-04T10:17:00.000-07:00

As my mom often does at the beginning of a letter, I will describe to you the scene from which I write.
I sit typing as I listen to the soft whisper of constant rain falling outside the open doorway. My tiny 8ft x 9 ft room is cut off from the rest of the house by an outdoor laundry room that opens to the rise of the apartment building we are in. Everything is painted lime green on the outside. One of my room mates spent over an hour tonight, describing hundreds of pictures and stories of family and friends. It is fun to get to know her. Another roommate sits across the open laundry room in our kitchen, writing letters to parents and planning for the next day. It is still unreal to be here and it has officially been 24 hours. The roar of the rain grows louder as it rains harder. Somehow I feel like this is what life will be like for the next few months….lots of rain! But it is beautiful and oh so green!
I spent 10 hours at my school today and I am already loving it. My partner teacher is just wonderful and spent a long time showing me around and introducing me to all the other teachers, staff, and administration. Everyone has been friendly and helpful. My 21 kids are great too. They introduced themselves to me, telling me their names and something “different” about them. After a pattern of, “I’m so and so and I’m from________.” One of the obviously Nicaraguan boys stood up and declared to be from Russia. All of them have quite the sense of humor and we are going to get along great. I have a quiz tomorrow on all of their names….the pressure is on! J
My flight seemed short and blessed. After balancing out the luggage to 49.5lbs. each suitcase I hauled another heavy carry on suitcase and backpack to Houston and on to Managua. On the 3 ½ hour flight to Managua I sat next to a very talkative friend named Oscar who warned me about everything not to eat, and not to do, as well as some good advice on exciting aspects of Nicaragua. I was thankful for the conversation which kept me from getting nervous as we landed….I was FINALLY here.
My roommates met me after going through customs, motioning through glass partitions as to where to get my luggage and how to carry it. We then went to get ice cream, the perfect welcome!
Things start early around here, the teacher van leaves at 6:30 sharp, and if you’re not there, you get left behind. Thus, I think I will call it a great first day and head to bed.
Missing you all already and continually praying for you as the Lord brings you to mind throughout the day and night. I feel your prayers for every moment. The Lord is carrying me for sure!

Feelings of leaving

2008-09-23T15:16:00.000-07:00

I've been asked by numerous people in the past couple weeks how I feel about leaving...the answer I have found as I've stumbled over words to describe deep feelings is: excited!
As I have struggled with the reality of leaving behind my wonderful college friends and the lives of so many I have poured into here, I have come to entrust these blessed relationships to the Lord as He is calling me to another stage in life. College went by TOO fast, but just as the Lord had planned. I can look back at these three years and five weeks with no regrets. I trust that I used every moment in dedication to serving my Lord. He has blessed the fruits of my labors more than I could ever ask or imagine!
Another part of me is terrified for starting a-new in another country, with no one to stand by my side, and a whole new language to learn.
Yet, as reality sets in and time ticks past in these last couple weeks I spend in Greeley, God has rained down peace that transcends ALL understanding to guard my heart and mind. Whatever He calls me to, He will provide the strength. Whatever He leads me through, He will be by my side. Whatever challenges I face, I know my Savior will sustain me.
I am nothing, yet I have the opportunity to be used for His glory....and this has never been made so clear to me as it is now.
Thus, many tears will fall in the next week as I say goodbyes....but in Christ there are no goodbyes. This world is not my home...I am a stranger passing through. Thus I hold loosly to the things of this world and press on to take hold of that for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus, to the praise and glory of the name above all names, unashamedly.