Quick Honduras Update because there is too much to share!
Many of you were praying for my spring break going to the
island and then the orphanage, so I want to update you on the Lord’s work
there.
When I was finally AWAY and had time to process, think, and
reflect on things while surrounded by white sandy beaches and sea breeze the
Lord led me into understanding some sin I had slipped into, which makes sense
because of the fast he had called me to in preparation for this time.
Basically, over the span of the past 3 months, I had slowly
gotten into the habit of filling needs and doing my work in my own strength. It
was ever so slight the shift: too many times of seeing or hearing a need and
being capable to help the situation, so instead of asking if it was ME who
needed to fill that role or the Lord, I just stepped up to the plate. Natural,
simple, sinful.
God reminded me that “everything done apart from faith is
sin.” (Rom. 14:23) So when I realized how weary
I had become in doing “good” it was because the “good” I was doing was
in my own strength --apart from ever leaning faith and guidance from Christ,
and so was thus sin. It explained a lot of the feelings of being “weighed down”
in relationships and frustrations I was feeling in dealing with people. I spent
quite some time repenting and asking God for redemption in those places where I
had taken control and therefore was really hurting, instead of helping the
other people I so dearly love.
As I was obedient in allowing God to show me and strip me of
self, he also blessed our time incredibly and gave unforgettable and
wonderfully relaxing experiences. Lots of “firsts” like snorkeling and swimming
with dolphins and renting a motorcycle to drive around the island. It was
delightful. Thank you for your prayers.
When we arrived home on Wed. night Nicole decided to
accompany me to the orphanage on Thursday morning, and I am so glad she did
because she was extremely blessed by that experience, and we got to completely
share in all the experiences of the week together.
I have never been so “welcomed” to an orphanage as when I
walked in the door to this one, which is amazing because in 3 days we built
deep, beautiful relationships with these 50 kids who reached out their hands,
not only to take our love, but to love on us too.
There were about 10 Honduran college students from a church
in Tegucigalpa that joined the school counselor, Nicole, and I in our 3 day
ministry camp for the kids. These students were simply on fire for the Lord and
showed us a community that is actively seeking and serving God together. Our
times of worship were many (about 5 times a day or more) and dozens of times a
day we just broke out into prayers for different things, needs we saw and
struggles that were strong.
God opened my eyes to the spiritual battle being fought in
that place, the fight for these kids lives is stronger than I can even imagine,
but we entered in to battle with them and all I can say is that we serve a
GIGANTIC God who LOVES His children, especially the fatherless. (Hosea 14:3)
2 nights we had a bonfire and laid hands on the kids and
interceded for them. God gave vision and power in prayer. I don’t think I
stopped murmering prayers in those 3 days because I knew it was what I was
called there to do.
I will share just one child’s story that was hugely
impacting.
Alex was a mess, we all noticed from the beginning. He had
burns and scars all over his face and arms. He would cuddle up to you, seeking
your attention and touch, but react very oddly at random moments, often falling
to the floor and screaming over nothing. On Friday afternoon he complained of a
headache for awhile, and then as the pain got worse started crying, and then
laying on the ground and screaming in pain, holding his head. Carlos, one of the
youth that was serving with us got down on his knees, took the child’s head in
his lap and started messaging his temples. He prayed and rubbed the kid’s head for
about 20 minutes until he was calm and then fell asleep. At that point we asked
what had happened to this kid and Ruth told us that his mom had been into
witchcraft and had used him as a sacrifice and put him in an oven. Horrifying. The
other orphan leader told us that when he got there he often woke up seeing
people watching him while he was sleeping that were big and dark and had scary
eyes.
Obviously it was the spiritual battle raging over this
child, and we just got a glimpse.
The cool thing is, with such an emphasis and understanding
of that battle over not just Alex, but each child’s life - their past, their
future, their hearts and minds - to simply understand that the battle is the
Lord’s and that we just ask and seek Him to do ALL the work in these kid’s
lives, strongholds were being broken and amazing changes were taking place. On
Saturday morning Alex woke up and told Hector that he had dreamt with angels
last night.
Wow…..my faith was encouraged, my vision broadened, my
prayer life soaring. It was so amazing to receive this reminder and to refocus
my ministry in all aspects on this reality.
(Ephesians 6: 12-13, 18)
For our
struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the
authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual
forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God,
so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and
after you have done everything, to stand….And
pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests.
With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.
These new perspectives were exactly what I needed to go back
to the ministry God has called me to at Pinares, in my students lives, and the
people around me, to arm me with truth, power, and passion through prayer and
believing faith. What a different strength now upholds me as I walk through
each day, seeking Him to do greater things than I could ask or imagine and
believing that He truly IS doing just that.
Page 3, shoot, this was supposed to be short. Forgive me friends,
for being consistently verbose. I will work on my summarizing skills this
summer so as not to burden you as much in this coming year. ONE more sweet
experience to share with you.
This weekend I was again awakened in my faith, although this
time alongside my church family. On Saturday night I decided to join a group
from my church who were doing a “virgilia” – which is basically translated
“vigil” – we met at about 8:30 at night at my friend Dora’s house and began
prayer, worship, and bible study that continued into the night past the normal
hours of sleeping and ended at 5:30 the next morning. It was quite a random
group that gathered, but we prayed from the beginning that the Lord would keep
us awake and that we would receive all that He had for us in that time
together, and it was amazing.
My words again are falling short. I guess it was one of
those times where I had to sit back and marvel because I watched these people
finding joy, satisfaction, and strength to get through the night, ONLY in the
Lord. After 4-5 hours of prayer and meditation and praise, the place of peace
in God’s presence was something I have only experienced on very few occasions.
Then allowing God’s strength to be sufficient as we headed to church after
sleeping for about an hour and watched the faces of the people literally SHINE
as they were SO satisfied in simply praising their Savior.
What struck me is that it was so SIMPLE, I had forgotten
what it was like to be on my knees, crying out to God in the wee hours of the
morning. I had allowed myself to be satisfied with lesser things than simply
God’s word, which is so FILLING. We searched his word together, flipping the
pages back and forth, eating, eating much and being so satisfied with the Bread
of Life. 15 people gathered in a room, determined to receive from the Lord and
over the span of that 15 hours seeing the Lord show up and fill us with His
Spirit and His grace – multifaceted grace was actually one of our topics of
study, and again I testify to the Lord being enough when all other things are
stripped away.
Friends, I want you to see the Lord in these ways. I want
Him to call you into some times of obedience where you get to that place on
your knees with Him and let Him alone satisfy you. Where you let Him alone fight
your battles and show you that He is more than sufficient for all things.
SURRENDER to His will, offer your bodies as living sacrifices, and see what
beautiful new things the Lord has to show you.
The rest I will express before the Lord in prayer, asking
for these insufficient words, to speak sufficiently to your heart through His
Spirit, to awaken in you that desire and passion to see God ALIVE in you, the
vision to be deepened, and your faith to soar.
I will close with this piece from my journal a little while
back:
“Living fully today I feel takes more energy than I can dig
up within me. In order to be all present, I need a lot of You God, to carry me
through each moment, I cannot succeed if You aren’t in all and through all. I
get to the end of a day exhausted, defeated, and discouraged. But, if I am
living by that abounding grace in every moment, then I can walk through the
moments in confidence the days with strength and the important realities with
vision. You see, if I am following God and seeking ot be close to His heart
there are adventures untold because every meaningless task is now trust focused
on a God who wants to transform ordinary to extraordinary in a day by day
process that displaces self and weeds out selfishness and self gratification or
glory. Oh how worthless it is to live each day for self when my God desires a
surrendered sacrifice so He may pour life and purpose into something so humble
and worthless if presented on its own. Father God, take all of me, may I be
ever only all for Thee. Jehovah Nissi – speak over Your servant, proclaim your
truth and power through me, bless my obedient heart with declarations of your
power as I die to self and You resurrect Your Renown. I live to be called by
Your name, to reflect Your presence with ever increasing glory and to live the
adventure each day of ever relying on Your Spirit to accomplish all things for
me. “When you are weak then you are strong” – this is the greatest adventure I
could live!”
Proverbs 4:18-26
18 But the path of the righteous is like the light
of dawn, That shines brighter and brighter until the full day.
19 The way of the wicked is like darkness;
They do not know over what they stumble.
20 My son, give attention to my
words;
Incline your ear to my sayings.
21 Do not let them depart from
your sight;
Keep them in the midst of your heart.
22 For
they are life to those who find them
And health to all their body.
23
Watch over your heart with all diligence,
For from it flow the springs
of life.
24 Put
away from you a deceitful mouth
And put devious speech far from you.
25 Let
your eyes look directly ahead
And let your gaze be fixed straight in front of
you.
26
Watch the path of your feet
And all your ways will be established.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRI-RmSNNjc
***Beautiful song that characterizes this month for me!
